I am in a situation that seems so surreal, like I don’t know what to think of it, sorry it may be a long post,,so I have a best friend, we’ve been friends for twelve years and she’s been more than a sister to me,we share everything and we’ve been together through a lot, I also have a fiancé and we all share the same social circle, like a large group of friends. I have been with my fiance 4 years now and last year june we welcomed our beautiful baby boy, though there were a lot of complications and I also had surgery due to those issues stayed in the hospital for a month and was on bedrest for the next few weeks. In August one of our friends had a wedding and it is like an eight hour drive away so I couldn’t attend coz it’s quite a hustle considering I wasn’t well and the baby was still too young but my fiance attended,so did my bff and a large part of our group. After the wedding,bff drove back with fiance stayed with me three days and had to go back to work which is not in the same city so I didn’t see her for months, everything went back to normal, I went back to work and everything seemed fine, I talked to her like usual and that was that, fast forward to this week, I came home from work guess who? Bff, heavily pregnant due any time now,her due date is 16 th. I welcome her,get her settled in everything is fine,we have dinner then start catching up, like I didn’t want to pry too much for I figured if she had wanted to tell me details of her pregnancy,she would, maybe she wasn’t comfortable yet, so I tell her we have to make plans go out,shop,eat you know normal stuff,then I ask when she’d be leaving so we can make the most of the time we have,she proceeds to tell me she isn’t leaving, I was confused and asked again like, what? She again states she isn’t leaving, I ask her why and her answer, OMG,the baby is my fiance’s. I was left speechless,then she says she’s thought about it and she’s not ready for mother hood so she came to deliver, stay for four months while she heals and rests then she’ll leave the baby here and go,at this point I feel like cameras are hidden somewhere and it’s a prank, half expecting she says it’s a joke but no, she’s as serious as a heart attack, which I was sort of having, I didn’t know what to do, how to react, whether to scream or yellow or kick her out,so I just left went to my room locked my self in but I couldn’t sleep either, I haven’t talked to fiance yet,he works as a sales rep and most of the week he’s away, so what do I do, currently it’s Saturday,the busiest day at the office and I can’t even think straight, how do I navigate this situation?
Bff pregnant with fiance’s baby, plans on leaving the baby with me coz she isn’t ready to be a mom
r/Advice
Comments
Grab your baby, grab your things and move out.
He can care for that baby. Why should you do that when both of them betrayed you and you have a baby yourself?
Telenovella time! On the chance this is real – I would talk to fiancé; if there is a chance the baby is his he cheated and I would be out. Hopefully you have somewhere to go. Pack your things, your babies stuff and leave. Find a way to co-parent your kid, and let him deal with his soap-opera
You get your ducks in a row and GTFO.
He cheated on you with your bestie and got her pregnant and never told you.
What a POS.
This is not a man you want to stay with or marry, or get stuck raising the affair child!
Pack up and move to a family members with your child if you can.
Contact a lawyer ASAP.
There are lots of possible things you can do. It’s really your choice. All the possibilities are shit. You’re not going to be happy again for quite a long time.
You could kick out your bff.
You could kick out your fiance but keep in mind that you don’t know for sure that he’s the father, and he will have rights to see your shared child for the next 17 years and he probably has rights to live in the house.
You could take your child and leave, but again, your fiance still has rights to see his child.
You could request a paternity test for the foetus.
You could tell your bff that you will not care for her baby, and she needs to make other plans.
You could accept her suggestion for you to raise her child, but make sure you talk to a lawyer about getting child support payments and a formal adoption.
If I was in your shoes, I would tell my bff that I will not care for her baby, and she needs to make other plans. I would also speak to my fiance to see whether he thinks it’s likely that he’s the father. If he admits to infidelity and I had not previously agreed to an open relationship then I’d leave him and talk to a lawyer about how to divide up our assets and parenting responsibilities.
Please leave this person. You deserve better than that.
I would call your fiancé now and put him on speakerphone with your BFF. The moment he confirms that this isn’t fake, tell him that you’ll have all of his belongings packed and ready to go for him to move out the moment he returns. Then show your ex-BFF to the door, because it’s your apartment, not hers, so she has no right to stay there.
Im Sorry that you are going through this unnecessary stress!
I could tell you what you need to do like talk to your fiancé and see what he has to say: if he says it’s a lie ➡️ Paternity Test ➡️ not his kid – maybe work it through; if it’s his Kid – LEAVE or if he says it’s true ➡️ LEAVE (because you don’t want your Kid to learn it’s ok to cheat & accept this disrespect in a relationship), because that would be the best for you & the baby but I’ll say: read your post again with the mindset that your friend told you about this situation. What would you tell/suggest your friend to do?
Because at the end of this day it’s your life to live and made a decision.
I wish you all the best OP
I couldn’t do it. It’s your fiancé mess. Protect your peace and focus on yourself and the baby.
Also call him now. This is a family emergency. Have his things packed.
No way would I accept that baby. Did BFF say the fiancé knows about baby? Like WTF????
Updateme
Where the Fk Is your fiance right now ?!!!