My bf(30M) and myself(31F) have been together almost two years. We live together and have definitely been through some shit together. I’ve been paying more attention lately because we’ve been actively working on our relationship, trying not to fall into the rut of life, that he never posts me or anything about our relationship on social media anymore. He used to in the beginning but now he never does. He really doesn’t send me cute things like that either through social media. Like the cute memes or posts about being together forever. It’s kind of all me most of the time. He sends me funny stuff or unhinged things but that’s about it. I know the importance of social media was a big strain on his last relationship so he’s not big on it in general. Which I understand. He’s posted something with me, about me, and about our relationship once since February. It’s the end of July. Social media isn’t a big deal to me but it would be nice to feel like he was proud to be with me.. is proud to have me.. I don’t even think he takes pictures of me like that either.. I can almost bet money that he hasn’t taken a real picture of me in months. At least one that wasn’t also about something else. Idk. It makes me sad, and self conscious. I just don’t know how to bring it up to him without it also triggering past issues he had with someone else. What should I do?
TL;DR; boyfriend doesn’t post me on social media. Isn’t hiding me. Has had issues in past with an ex. It makes me sad. How do I address this?
Comments
How do you know he doesn’t post pics of you because he: 1) Is a private person 2) Maybe hates pictures/selfies in general and is self-conscious himself? Talk to him like you said.
>Social media isn’t a big deal to me
Makes post about how its important for your boyfriend to post more about you on social media, somehow thinks social media isnt a big deal to you……..
It doesn’t matter at all. It’s a time-waster and always was. You address it by not caring abut things that don’t matter.
I feel like this is a you problem. Social media is toxic and maybe he just doesn’t want to post that much. You should not feel insecure because he doesn’t post about you on social. How does he treat you as a person? How happy are you together? Why do you care this much about social media?
I think social media is a blight on society. If I were you, I’d stop letting it affect my life so much.
> Social media isn’t a big deal to me
Sorry but it sounds like it is. My profile picture is me, my wife, and my kids. I have no other posts of them and no other posts in general, apart from a few posts on my story. You’re assuming a lot about your boyfriend based off of social media posts knowing it was a big strain in his last relationship.
Truth is, many men don’t care about social media and it can be the cause of a lot of issues in relationships. It’s truly not a big deal and social media in general is a cancer. You’re most likely seeing all your friends being posted by their boyfriends and whatnot and it’s robbing you of the actual relationship happiness. It’s also his social media and he can choose what goes on it.
Comparison is the theft of joy.
If social media isn’t a big deal to you then I think you’re overreacting. I’m 39 and the older I get the less I post.
Let’s be real. Social media IS a big deal to you or this wouldn’t be a problem. If taking pictures and being posted is something you need, communicate that. If he isn’t willing to accommodate that, you may just not be compatible. If he is, great.
Some people just don’t care about socials. Some people used to like it more and have grown up and bored of it. He probably just isn’t interested in posting stuff. Doesn’t mean he doesn’t love you or isn’t proud of you. Showing off or boasting on social media is not a guaranteed sign of love or enthusiasm for the relationship.
Your relationship isn’t in the honeymoon period any more. It sounds like you don’t have any real problems if this is what you are spending your days worrying about…