Boyfriends and my energy levels are different – are we incompatible or is it okay to adapt?

I want to keep this as short as possible. My bf (18,m) and I (18,f) have been together for 2 years now. Our relationship circumstances are pretty annoying (his parents cant know about me for now, would not accept it because of cultural reasons) and we often see eachother with time-pressure, or dont see eachother for a few days. So we have to make up talking, closeness, etc. EVERYTHING in short (1-2h) meetups or over the phone sometimes. And obv, not everything thats imporant for a rls fits in that time frame.

Now for my question: I would call myself very energetic, not in a bad way but i am a LOT. My closest friends and people around me all say they enjoy how I am, but if we we‘re to be together over a long period it would exhaust them. I am just very clingy and talkactive. I dont think that makes me less good as a person or anything, and I love how I am, but I myself think if I was friends with myself it would be too much for me sometimes.
My bf always says he likes how I am and the type of personality I have. But when he is tired he can get annoyed or distant because it exhausts him. today he said smth (over text, couldnt see eachother), that made me think.

(for context) we have different topics to work on too, we are very different in our communication styles and needs for closeness, after a discussion for example he seeks distance for a while while I seek closeness, and his way of communication could be a lil more mature, bcs he sometimes distances himself when its important to be there. But I dont think that matters too much with this topic)

He got triggered by a big amount of snapchat videos I sent him today, because he was tired and I wanted to show him what I had bought, and when he didnt want to call he said I could show him in videos. He afterwards said he didnt expect it zo be that many that fast and I think it triggered him.
he later told me, that he doesnt really want to meet up, because he isnt in a mood to talk. I then said, that we can still meet up and just be close without talking much. He answered that this is great in theory but doesnt really work with me, bcs I say we will just be in peace and not really talk but if we meet up I then will talk as much as always and expect his normal reactions. And, to be fair, this has happened before.
Two things I dont like, that he wrote, bcs they were more passive and not very mature communication were things along the lines „why‘d you think I dont want to meet up often“ or „I cant understand how you could want to call and facetime every day“. We always sleep on call, so I asked if he would say that this also exhausts him and he said things like that not, only when I expect him to talk and ask and just want a lot of conversation.
I proceeded to ask, if he thinks my type of energy is cute, and likes it when he himself is energetic, but if its too much when he is already tired, or just quieter. (bcs he always says he loves the way I am). He answered yes to this.
So I‘m just annoyed rn, because we cant talk about it atm, he is at work rn, and because of the situation our relationship is in, and we cant just meet whenerver we want, I wont be able to talk with him about this in the next few days, and right now after this chat, he is a little bit distant which leaves me overthinking (I can spiral and think about the whole relationship pretty quickly, because I am scared of not being accepted, working on this.)

The point is, when do you realize if you are just incompatible? Because if I imagine myself with a highly energetic person, I think it wouldnt match with me because we would both annoy eachother with our „muchness“. And I can be really peacful and also quiet, he just doesnt really know this side of me, because we see eachother (as explained above) only a small / restricted amount of time and havent experienced that „everyday-life“. I am sometimes pretty peacful energy at home and when I am with him I spill everything at once, am clingy and loud, etc. So now he thinks I can never just be there in silence, accept his quietness and still feel comfortable.

TL;DR: I dont know if I would cut myself short if I tried to be a little „less“, because my boyfriends and my energy levels are different, or if it is normal and okay to be match energys like that (also given the circumastances). We love eachother a lot and I dont thinks it is incompatible, but I dont want to lie to myself.