But they said…

Now at 31 almost hitting 32 I feel the most insecure I have ever felt.. but I thought they said when you hit your 30s you’ll feel a sense of relief, a confidence that is released within you. The worries that you once had in your 20s are now a thing of the past when it comes to your social life.

For me right now, I look at myself and feel sorry for that person… He looks tired, he looks drained no matter what he does, he looks unhappy.. like genuine happiness, and as funny as this sounds he looks like he has passed his peak, and everything triggers him more so now than before.

This has nothing to do with age. This has all to do with the level of insecurities that one person carries around subconsciously.

I feel like everyone is better looking than me, everyone is more successful than me, everyone has got their life together (for the most part) because I know that no one has it all figured out, but they have the basic tools to do life. I also know that all of this are based on my own assumptions which is why I am here writing this now. Assumptions are my insecurities screaming at me through a wall.

These assumptions are affecting the way that I think. I am not only comparing myself when it comes to looks with other people but I am also comparing myself to myself. I am comparing where I was and where I am now. If you would hear this you would say that, that is a good thing, you need to better yourself but no. In this case its socially and about vanity, and self worth and when you are harsh on yourself naturally you will always be at the bottom of the barrel.

I am insecure beyond measure in my early 30s… but I thought they said those days are long gone?!

Comments

  1. Salt-Werewolf8926 Avatar

    I’m 34 and I feel similar. I have no direction, drive, minimal support, virtually no friends.

  2. simpleredstar Avatar

    Oh mood.

    I’m turning 31 in a couple of weeks and I hate myself so much more than I did when I was in my twenties.

    I’m fatter, less motivated and everything just feels like an upward climb with no point nor reward at the end.