TL;DR I hung out with my boyfriends sort of friend and he says that’s weird because it was his friend first
I 18 female and my boyfriend 19 male have been debating about whether or not this situation is weird. I am a bit autistic and struggle with social norms so I would love some opinions on this.
Basically, my boyfriend is in college and I am in high school, I visit him often and when I do I always talk to his friends with one friend in particular I talk to the most. He has a lot of common interests as me and we are very similar. He is also the only one who texts me outside of visits. My boyfriend says that they aren’t close anymore and they don’t talk or hang out. Anyway, We both have a common interest in fishing, so when I knew I was going to be in his town, I texted and asked if he wanted to go fishing with me and we ended up spending the day together. Later my boyfriend told me that this was weird because this guy is supposed to be his friend and shouldn’t be friends with me, especially because he thinks the guy is nicer to me than him. I don’t really get it because the guy seemed to have a good time and said he’d like to do it again. So if it were weird wouldn’t he just say no? and why should I not be friends with someone just because they’re friends with my boyfriend? Idk I am confused and conflicted.
Comments
There might be reasons why your BF doesn’t trust or like this guy, but his logic here “He’s supposed to be MY friend!” is the delusions of a second grader, not the real concerns of an adult.
You’re allowed to choose your own friends.
It’s good to listen to your partners opinions and concerns, but stand firm in your own judgment and expect it to be respected: You can choose your own friends. You can expect him to respect that and trust you.
He is not a second grader. You can expect him not to behave like one.