Can someone just reply to this post and tell me it’s gonna be okay, I’m crying uncontrollably, and I’m so afraid, because life is passing me by, and I feel more and more lost.
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Something in you doesn’t want to give up and you keep trying! Stick with that pattern and don’t give up, you will get out! It’s not going to be easy, but it is going to be worth it. And when you’ve felt the lowest of lows, once you heal a little bit, the highs are even better. I was where you are last year and today I happy cried simply because I noticed I was clear headed and in the moment and enjoying my life. A year ago I would have never thought that could happen. You got this.
It’ll be ok. Really. Keep trying. Don’t exhaust yourself doing so, but keep plugging away at one or two small things, and eventually, you’ll start to notice things getting better. A journal can help. When Im really depressed I make myself a checklist – brush teeth, shower, 10 minute walk, 5 minute meditation, text a friend just to ask them how they are, etc. Tiny goals. It really helps. Im not sure what you’re going through, but I know it will get better if you dont give up.
It’s not always going to feel like this. Every thing will work out. Not every day has to be a good day for it to be a good week or month or year.
Here’s a random thing: Someone just told me that if you only have 20% and you give that 20%, then good job you gave 100% that day, you can go take a nap in celebration. Your life doesn’t have to be at some predetermined stage. Celebrate that you made it this far because you are strong and a survivor.
You’re doing good and I’m proud of you for hanging in there and not giving up. You’re an amazing miracle and we’re lucky to be here with you.
You are not alone in what you’re going through. People somewhere around the world have gone/are going through a situation similar to yours and do come out to the other side, take solace in that. Things do get better, don’t forget that you’re worthy of as much love as anyone else.
Think to yourself ok in a months time I want to look back on this as the event catalyst that drove me to change so it wouldn’t happen again.
Download a breathwork app so you can train yourself not to react.
Sign up for a self defense class so you’ll be more confident and less likely to panic if they get violent.
Take steps to distance yourself
Make a plan for what to do next time e.g if they start picking a fight I’ll leave the room, if they follow me I’ll go for a long walk with my phone on DND.
There’s always light at the end of the tunnel you just have to ignore the voice in your head the Nparent put there saying you cant walk towards it.
Don’t worry. It’ll be fiiiiine. Yes it doesn’t feel like it right now but you have to get up and keep going! Yes it is frustrating. Yes it is hard. Yes you want to restart life. Yes you want to die. Yes you are depressed but that doesn’t matter. Because if living with narcs taught us one thing it would be to never ever give up! Had we gave up, we wouldn’t be even here. So cry and get frustrated but get back up again.
You will be alone in the dark. You have to be your own light. You have to guide your own way. You have to put the pedle to the metal. You have to keep going till then end of the world. You have to put in more effort to achieve a goal as simple as happiness.
But the day you reach there, is the day you should stand with your head high. You were dealt the worst possible hand but you managed to turn it into a jackpot. That is the day you stand shoulder to shoulder to the “privileged” people and look them in the eye. Just because life dealt them better cards never means you are inferior to them.
So cry all you want. It is a good way to let out stress. But get up and prove every single word your nparents said wrong. Fight for you because no one will do. And remember, 2 things are your magic. Believing in yourself and never giving up.
I was about to make a post just like this the other day, asking for uplifting messages :(. I’m so sorry you’re hurting too. Please know that you are not alone and there is still beautiful and wonderful things to discover and experience. Take a deep breath, one tiny moment at a time
I’m not sure what specific situations have upset you this deeply and have got you to this point. What I do want to say is that you are loved and there’s no need to let any narcissist at all influence how you view yourself or your life. Everyone deserves love and respect and the way any narcissistic person treated you is not right and you should not judge yourself based on the lies and evil that they spoke over your life. God loves you, love yourself and don’t believe any of the lies from the narcissist. I’m not sure how your situation is, but I would strongly recommend going no contact that is the best thing to do with the narcissist. You are Loved and God bless you.
It’s all going to be okay. This is just a short Season in your life. You’re doing the right thing asking for reassurance an if you have to, ask daily. Virtual hugs and comfort to you.
Keep crying and then rest, rest, rest. We underestimated how exhausted this can make us. I once stayed in bed for three days non stop crying. That was about 5 years ago. Things are a hell of a lot easier now.
Baby steps. We are here to help. Wishing you strength x
I’m in your position currently, still trying to change my life (look at post history).
I was really really low. Like I could not imagine my future kinda low. I didn’t know what to do and kept praying to any gods out there (I’m an atheist) to help me restart my life from scratch. Obviously, not possible but I decided to start to change my life few months ago. I’ve accepted I’m never going to really thrive but as long as there days where I’m like “today was a good day” that’s all i need. There’s going to be bad days but that’s normal and will eventually pass.
It’s corny, but life will get better. It’s sad that we can’t go back to our childhood and change the future, but as long as we are tiny bit better than yesterday is all that matters.
Since you posted on this subreddit and want to run away (assuming AP), I suggest therapy and planning your financials. That’s where I am at now, trying to get my financials in order for therapy and to move to the other side of the planet. Counselling helps too and can give you resources (in aus it’s beyondblue but idk where you live).
Comments
This is an automated message posted to ALL posts in RBN.
RBN is a heavily moderated subreddit. Any rule breaking, regardless if it is the first-time offense, may result in an immediate ban. Failure to read our rules in full will not absolve you from breaking the rules. If you have not read our rules, read them first before commenting.
Please report inappropriate content so it can be reviewed by a moderator.
Our rules include (but not limited to):
For a full list of our rules/more information, click here.
If you are confused about some acronyms or terminology, click here!
Need info or resources? Check out our Helpful Links for information on how to deal with identity theft, how to get independent of your n-parents, how to apply for FAFSA, how to identify n-parents and SO MUCH MORE!
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It’s going to be okay! You are brave for reaching out!
Something in you doesn’t want to give up and you keep trying! Stick with that pattern and don’t give up, you will get out! It’s not going to be easy, but it is going to be worth it. And when you’ve felt the lowest of lows, once you heal a little bit, the highs are even better. I was where you are last year and today I happy cried simply because I noticed I was clear headed and in the moment and enjoying my life. A year ago I would have never thought that could happen. You got this.
It’ll be ok. Really. Keep trying. Don’t exhaust yourself doing so, but keep plugging away at one or two small things, and eventually, you’ll start to notice things getting better. A journal can help. When Im really depressed I make myself a checklist – brush teeth, shower, 10 minute walk, 5 minute meditation, text a friend just to ask them how they are, etc. Tiny goals. It really helps. Im not sure what you’re going through, but I know it will get better if you dont give up.
You are worthy of love and happiness. It gets better. I promise it does.
It’s not always going to feel like this. Every thing will work out. Not every day has to be a good day for it to be a good week or month or year.
Here’s a random thing: Someone just told me that if you only have 20% and you give that 20%, then good job you gave 100% that day, you can go take a nap in celebration. Your life doesn’t have to be at some predetermined stage. Celebrate that you made it this far because you are strong and a survivor.
You’re doing good and I’m proud of you for hanging in there and not giving up. You’re an amazing miracle and we’re lucky to be here with you.
It gets better, I promise.
Everything will be okay!!! Even if it doesn’t feel like it right now. You are strong, you are loved and you are never alone!!
You’re going to be okay.
I don’t usually comment here but anyways.
You are not alone in what you’re going through. People somewhere around the world have gone/are going through a situation similar to yours and do come out to the other side, take solace in that. Things do get better, don’t forget that you’re worthy of as much love as anyone else.
Wishing you all the best!
Think to yourself ok in a months time I want to look back on this as the event catalyst that drove me to change so it wouldn’t happen again.
Download a breathwork app so you can train yourself not to react.
Sign up for a self defense class so you’ll be more confident and less likely to panic if they get violent.
Take steps to distance yourself
Make a plan for what to do next time e.g if they start picking a fight I’ll leave the room, if they follow me I’ll go for a long walk with my phone on DND.
There’s always light at the end of the tunnel you just have to ignore the voice in your head the Nparent put there saying you cant walk towards it.
YANA
It’s okay to take a break from the fight. Go into grey rock mode. Stay at school or work or out with friends or at the library as much as you can.
You are going to be okay, sending you hugs and a cuppa hot chocolate.
Be patient and take life less seriously
Even though your situation probably feels like rock bottom now, suffering is always temporary. You will have a good day again.
It’s going to be okay ..🩷
Love you you’ve got this, even if you feel like no one is the same as you, we are
E-hug!!
Don’t worry. It’ll be fiiiiine. Yes it doesn’t feel like it right now but you have to get up and keep going! Yes it is frustrating. Yes it is hard. Yes you want to restart life. Yes you want to die. Yes you are depressed but that doesn’t matter. Because if living with narcs taught us one thing it would be to never ever give up! Had we gave up, we wouldn’t be even here. So cry and get frustrated but get back up again.
You will be alone in the dark. You have to be your own light. You have to guide your own way. You have to put the pedle to the metal. You have to keep going till then end of the world. You have to put in more effort to achieve a goal as simple as happiness.
But the day you reach there, is the day you should stand with your head high. You were dealt the worst possible hand but you managed to turn it into a jackpot. That is the day you stand shoulder to shoulder to the “privileged” people and look them in the eye. Just because life dealt them better cards never means you are inferior to them.
So cry all you want. It is a good way to let out stress. But get up and prove every single word your nparents said wrong. Fight for you because no one will do. And remember, 2 things are your magic. Believing in yourself and never giving up.
What’s going on? It sounds like you need more than just that.
You are loved. Please believe that you are loved.
I was about to make a post just like this the other day, asking for uplifting messages :(. I’m so sorry you’re hurting too. Please know that you are not alone and there is still beautiful and wonderful things to discover and experience. Take a deep breath, one tiny moment at a time
I’m not sure what specific situations have upset you this deeply and have got you to this point. What I do want to say is that you are loved and there’s no need to let any narcissist at all influence how you view yourself or your life. Everyone deserves love and respect and the way any narcissistic person treated you is not right and you should not judge yourself based on the lies and evil that they spoke over your life. God loves you, love yourself and don’t believe any of the lies from the narcissist. I’m not sure how your situation is, but I would strongly recommend going no contact that is the best thing to do with the narcissist. You are Loved and God bless you.
It’s all going to be okay. This is just a short Season in your life. You’re doing the right thing asking for reassurance an if you have to, ask daily. Virtual hugs and comfort to you.
Keep crying and then rest, rest, rest. We underestimated how exhausted this can make us. I once stayed in bed for three days non stop crying. That was about 5 years ago. Things are a hell of a lot easier now.
Baby steps. We are here to help. Wishing you strength x
I’m in your position currently, still trying to change my life (look at post history).
I was really really low. Like I could not imagine my future kinda low. I didn’t know what to do and kept praying to any gods out there (I’m an atheist) to help me restart my life from scratch. Obviously, not possible but I decided to start to change my life few months ago. I’ve accepted I’m never going to really thrive but as long as there days where I’m like “today was a good day” that’s all i need. There’s going to be bad days but that’s normal and will eventually pass.
It’s corny, but life will get better. It’s sad that we can’t go back to our childhood and change the future, but as long as we are tiny bit better than yesterday is all that matters.
Since you posted on this subreddit and want to run away (assuming AP), I suggest therapy and planning your financials. That’s where I am at now, trying to get my financials in order for therapy and to move to the other side of the planet. Counselling helps too and can give you resources (in aus it’s beyondblue but idk where you live).
<3
Breathe. As annoying as it sounds, just breathe. Crying can be helpful. That sounds annoying too. I know. You’re here and you’re not alone.