This is a throwaway for obvious reasons! I remembered this story when listening to the “Hoobie Doobie” story from today’s episode (24th April).
Years ago, in my 20s, I (44F) was seeing a guy casually who was a friend of someone in our friend group. We were FWB and would hang out with our mutual friends without any drama. For a while, it was a great time and everyone was happy. We were clear with each other that neither was interested in a relationship and we’d make sure we didn’t catch feelings, but if we did, we’d call it off and go back to being friends. (Oh, the optimism of 20-somethings, lol!)
A little bit of context – this story happened in Australia. My FWB “Tom” was from the UK, as was one of the other friends in the group. Heaps of inside jokes came from some of the different terms and sayings they had, and we’d all gently tease each other for being “too English” or “too Aussie”.
One of the sayings that evolved was to say “Mummy” whenever something mildly bad happened. Like, if you stub your toe, drop a sandwich, that sort of thing. I think it originally started with “I need my Mummy” (as a variation of “I need an adult”) and we used it so often that it evolved into just saying “Mummy” instead of “oops”. Tom and I would say it the most (probably because we both had ADHD and are/were super clumsy)!
One night we went back to his place after a few drinks and fell into bed, as usual. He didn’t usually last very long when he was drunk, and I could sort of tell he was concentrating and trying to delay the inevitable, for my sake.
After a few minutes, he lost that battle, and as he was finishing he let out a sort of frustrated-sounding “Mummy”.
I froze, eyes wide.
The lights were off and he just rolled over, took off the condom, and didn’t take long to fall asleep, while I lay there staring at the ceiling in shock. I wanted to laugh, but was also just so stunned. This man just said “Mummy” to me while he came.
Now, I’m 100% sure that he meant it as an “oops”, just because of how often we would say it. I think it just became a habit for both of us. But, at the time there was zero chance I was ever going to get over hearing “Mummy” at the literal moment this man ejaculated into me. I couldn’t look at him the same ever again. The ick was there to stay.
So, after a few days when I knew I wasn’t going to ever be attracted to him again, I full-on lied in this man’s face and told him I had started to develop feelings for him and that we should call off our arrangement, like we’d agreed in the beginning.
Of course, he was incredibly sweet about it all, which made me feel worse.
I gradually drifted away from those friends, because, while I had stopped saying “Mummy” and gone back to just “oops”, no one else had. So any time someone spilled a drink or made a mistake, I was getting ptsd flashbacks of hearing “Mummy” in bed, but couldn’t tell anyone about it or get them to stop!
I’ve only ever told my husband this story. He’s never said it in bed.
Edit: I put what I thought was the episode number, but that was totally wrong. OOPS!
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Backup of the post’s body: This is a throwaway for obvious reasons! I remembered this story when listening to the “Hoobie Doobie” story from today’s episode (#470 24th April).
Years ago, in my 20s, I (44F) was seeing a guy casually who was a friend of someone in our friend group. We were FWB and would hang out with our mutual friends without any drama. For a while, it was a great time and everyone was happy. We were clear with each other that neither was interested in a relationship and we’d make sure we didn’t catch feelings, but if we did, we’d call it off and go back to being friends. (Oh, the optimism of 20-somethings, lol!)
A little bit of context – this story happened in Australia. My FWB “Tom” was from the UK, as was one of the other friends in the group. Heaps of inside jokes came from some of the different terms and sayings they had, and we’d all gently tease each other for being “too English” or “too Aussie”.
One of the sayings that evolved was to say “Mummy” whenever something mildly bad happened. Like, if you stub your toe, drop a sandwich, that sort of thing. I think it originally started with “I need my Mummy” (as a variation of “I need an adult”) and we used it so often that it evolved into just saying “Mummy” instead of “oops”. Tom and I would say it the most (probably because we both had ADHD and are/were super clumsy)!
One night we went back to his place after a few drinks and fell into bed, as usual. He didn’t usually last very long when he was drunk, and I could sort of tell he was concentrating and trying to delay the inevitable, for my sake.
After a few minutes, he lost that battle, and as he was finishing he let out a sort of frustrated-sounding “Mummy”.
I froze, eyes wide.
The lights were off and he just rolled over, took off the condom, and didn’t take long to fall asleep, while I lay there staring at the ceiling in shock. I wanted to laugh, but was also just so stunned. This man just said “Mummy” to me while he came.
Now, I’m 100% sure that he meant it as an “oops”, just because of how often we would say it. I think it just became a habit for both of us. But, at the time there was zero chance I was ever going to get over hearing “Mummy” at the literal moment this man ejaculated into me. I couldn’t look at him the same ever again. The ick was there to stay.
So, after a few days when I knew I wasn’t going to ever be attracted to him again, I full-on lied in this man’s face and told him I had started to develop feelings for him and that we should call off our arrangement, like we’d agreed in the beginning.
Of course, he was incredibly sweet about it all, which made me feel worse.
I gradually drifted away from those friends, because, while I had stopped saying “Mummy” and gone back to just “oops”, no one else had. So any time someone spilled a drink or made a mistake, I was getting ptsd flashbacks of hearing “Mummy” in bed, but couldn’t tell anyone about it or get them to stop!
I’ve only ever told my husband this story. He’s never said it in bed.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
omg I’m reading this and just paused on that exact story- it had me in tears lol!! This one is also crazy 😂😂 Morgan should do a full NSFW episode!
Noooo not mummy, what the hell 😭
How did your husband take it?
Welp, that’s a wrap.
That sounds like a bad way to get out of it and you just got lucky.
He could have gotten feelings for you and kept it to him self, when you confessed he could have come clean and tried turning it to a full relationship and it would have been a bigger mess.
Hard to believe people do this willingly.
The scream I scrumpt 😱 (I’m a stickler for grammar, but this was the only appropriate response I could muster)
Kind of an extreme reaction, but I hope you both had lives that worked out after that.
You’re 44 and use the word ‘ick’ — thanks for the laugh. Oh yah, cool story
So you made a decision based on your emotions despite logically knowing what he actually meant? That’s pretty dumb but hey, it’s your life. I certainly wouldn’t trust you to make any decisions lol
even if he hadn’t said that, who wants to have sex with a guy who comes in 3 minutes and rolls over to sleep instead of him pleasing the partner. that’s not even sex, that’s him masturbating on you like you’re a blow up doll
That’s amazing. Love it.
Ok I don’t care how the hell you people frame it — FWB culture is fucking cringe. It’s fucking cringe. You are far and away the most likely to get sick with some fucked-up disease and it’s like that’s cool if YOU don’t care but you’re going to give it to someone who does care before you’re even aware that you have it.
If y’all are going to be fucking gross, say it. Weed yourselves out. 💀
If a woman said “Mummy” while in bed with me, I’d assume she was fantasizing about Imhotep.
You lost your whole friend group because he accidentally said mummy?😭