so ive wanted a job since ive been 16. and now that im 17 i put in applications and got accepted, did an interview now i just need to fill out my birth certificate stuff. my mom lost it. so i cant go to mcdonalds. i dont have a bank account because she wont make me one or wont allow me to open one. i have a sponsored cashapp but me and my stepfather got in an “argument” that HE started btw. and he cut everything off my cashapp and wont give me my card. my mom is taking his side on everything and i have no job i turn 18 in december. the argument me and my “stepdad” had was i was walking around in a sports bra and covered myself with my arm, he stopped and said “why do you cover yourself if you would wear that in public”. i looked at him and walked away. he then got mad and cut my receiving and sending money off of my cashapp, which i have screenshots of. and my mom wont do anything about it. i cant get a job without a bank account or without my birth certificate. may i please get help? (i live in mississippi.)
confused 17yo.
r/Advice
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I don’t have any really good advice, so I’m sorry. But you need to distance yourself as soon as you’re able to.
Some times you can spin bad circumstances into, well, at least I will not be like them!
While waiting for anyone knowing your country’s administration to comment, there’s a chance you can get a copy of your birth certificate in your birth town (if it’s not too far).
If you have no way of getting any hold on your money, then maybe try working gigs like tutoring or babysitting where they’d give you money in cash. (but this will kind of defeat the purpose of your post).
You can also look into emancipation, so that you can open your own bank account on your own.
I’m sorry you’re dealing with this. First, try replacing your birth certificate through Mississippi’s vital records office, which you can usually do online. As for the Cash App issue, it’s unfair your stepdad cut you off, especially over something so small. If you can, talk to a trusted adult or counselor for help. Since you’ll be 18 soon, things might get easier, but try to find resources to support you in the meantime. Stay strong!
Yeah sounds like your step dad needs a slap in face.🤣 who the fuck says that to the their daughter, you can wear whatever you want, and regarding your job process information, you can get the birth certificate yourself and buy it from the district and bank information, you can literally walk to the bank by yourself and sign up for it but got to buy the account and get your card there too.
Call your vital records department. You can get your birth cert from them. Look it up on google. Mississippi charges around $17 for a birth certificate.
Sell some clothes to your friends and you can go around your parental units and cash apps.
It sounds tense. If you need help reach out to a school counselor immediately for your mental health and they can help you in this process.
Huge hopes for your amazing success in your life!
And if it’s McDonald’s that will begin your career they offer ways around bank accounts now with cards that work like a debit card.
You can definitely get a birth certificate, just search for how to do it in your state. I actually had to get one myself, I’m in PA. Good luck with it all.
That how people ended up worst off
Go to courthouse. Get new one. Also your parents are terrible for controlling you like that. Just awful
The state of Mississippi will replace your birth certificate.
Hi. I was in a similar position as you. I am now 30 and life is good. It will take time though. Life is going to be hard and you will have to fight tooth and nail to become free, and no one is going to save you or care about you. You have to save yourself. You will find sympathetic people eventually, but you will have to prove you are capable of taking care of yourself first. It’s unfair, but it’s the way that it goes.
Your parents might have your paperwork (birth certificate, social security, etc) somewhere. My parents told me they had lost them for years but I found my birth certificate and vaccination records in their normal bills/taxes folders while they were away. All I had to replace was my social security card. If you haven’t looked yourself you need to. If you cannot find them, get them, you will need them to set up a bank account at 18.
Get out. The moment you are 18 you can open a bank account, get a PO box, and leave. I did this with 0 money to my name and no car. The hardest and easiest thing I have ever done is go to college. They will let you take out loans that will let you pay for a semester or two. College is housing, food, opportunity, community. If you don’t feel confident you can pass your classes after your first year figure something else out. Do a trade, become skilled in something. But that first year will set you up for a life free from your parents.
You might have complicated feelings about your parents. But let’s get one thing clear. They are at the very least, not your friends. Parents should want all their children to succeed and grow. Your parents want to keep you dumb and miserable until they can marry you off to someone or have a built in house keeper. Get out.
Rules of engagement. Do not loan money to your parents. You will never get it back. Do not loan money to anyone if you can’t afford to lose it forever. Don’t get into drugs, I’ve seen so many like me seek thrill rather than stability. Some of them are dead. Choose stability. Make friends. If you go the college route, see if they offer free therapy. And for God sakes if you spend thousands on an education MAKE IT COUNT. This is not the time to get a degree in art history.
Your parents are setting you up to fail so they can control you. Are youn graduated or ged? I was in a similar situation, so I have some advice you probably won’t be interested in. But if you talk to a recruiter they can help you get all the documents you need to join the service. Just have to commit four years and you will have financial independence from your parent and a trade, plus a lot of other perks. Hope it all works out for you!