This problem persists since I was a little kid but it feels like it got worse now (I’m 20). My father is an alcoholic, he has never hit us or been agressive in any way, but there’s not a day in this world in which he will not drink something.
Once he finishes his work schedule, he goes to the closest pub to drink for 2-3 hours. This causes daily arguments and anger for my mother. The worst one was today: he was absent for longer than usual (5 hours) and my mother told me that she’s going after him at the pub, and if I wanna come with her. I agreed and once we’ve got there, she asked me to get inside and tell him to leave. I did that and once we got home we’ve had a huge argument: he was really mad and kept screaming about how ashamed was he in that moment and that “it tarnished his pride”, while my mother kept cursing and how she’s tired of it all, and how she’s actually happy this happened because “now he’s as mad as she is every night”.
In a way I agree that she didn’t take the right choices that day because the way she treated the situation felt more like a revenge, but at the same time I agree with her: imagine getting furious mostly every day because someone does something you dislike and he just doesn’t care at all and refuses to change anything, it’s just a cup of anger that is over-filled and you’re tired of trying to change things. I find him guilty for this whole problem.
The main thing that we should make him accept is that alcohol is bad (besides the health issues, all the anger and issues he provokes should make him feel guilty). There’s no problem if he drink 1-2 beers/day or occasionally (even if he gets drunk only 1 or 2 times per week would be a huge improvement). The only idea that is coming to my mind and could improve the situation would be a psycholog, but it will be hard to convince him. It’s hard to even convince my mother, she’s just tired and she doesn’t have the necessary power to fight with this anymore.
TL;DR : My father is an alcoholic and this issue creates many arguments. I would like to make him understand that what he is doing is bad, hoping he will stop.
Comments
Hi! Good morning!
Sad situation. Admire your being rational. Very important
If your mother can get a source of Income, it will ease the pressure. See if you can help her to get an income. Some home based or a job or something that takes are away from the same four walls. She needs to create happy memories about her skills. Money helps
Money make life easier at the basic level.
This is my suggestion.