TL;DR: OP (23F) became close friends with Mohana in high school, who dated Rahul. After they broke up during the COVID lockdown, OP and Rahul started bonding over their personal growth and breakups. Despite initial hesitation and drama, especially from Mohana, they eventually fell in love and have now been happily together for 4 years. OP lost touch with her school group, especially Mohana, who continues to post shady things online. Despite the drama and guilt, OP doesn’t regret choosing love and finally prioritizing her own happiness.
As the title says. I know a lot of u r gonna already hate me and I don’t want to give any justification coz there is none, but I just feel like my part of the story was never told n alas today randomly I decided to write this on Reddit.
So I(23F) became friends with this girl ( let’s call her Mohana) in class 9 and eventually we didn’t like each other but after 6 months we had a group of 5 girls and we all became great friends. I was already closer to 2 of them before this so ofc they were my bias but whatever we all had a strong bond. So Mohana started dating a guy called Rahul from our school from class 11 and since the guy was also in our section due to our stream, eventually we all became like this huge group of 9 friends consisting of the Mohanas friends aka us 4 girls and Rahul’s friends.
After this the next 2 years they dated so basically throughout high school. I eventually became good friends with him just as I was with the rest of the group. Anyway, during that time I was in a toxic n weird relationship w another guy. Well to say the least, he was manipulative, dominating, short tempered,horny all the time and to make things worse he was 4years older than me. He completely took advantage of me both emotionally and physically. And it has been a pattern for me coz the guy I dated before him for a few months (class 8) was also older n pretty much the same to me as my ex but in a different font.
Anyway so we just finished our 12th exm and Covid happens we’re stuck in our homes. That was the time Rahul and I started talking a lot since we were bored af. We both are genuinely such different individuals, it was quite interesting to talk to him altho our main goals in life were pretty similar. Sitting at home all day made me realise a lot of stuff abt my relationship so I eventually had the guts to call things off with my then bf and suddenly became very spiritual. That was the time when I really changed as a person. Doing meditation, eating clean, exercising etc. Rahul was also in a similar path as me. So finally that was a middle ground for us to talk to. So during that time, Mohana started changing a lot, became a totally different person as in her innocence n childish behaviour was kind of gone. She started drinking and smoking w her cousins n just gave a really negative vibe. As we all predicted Mohana n Rahul broke up after 3 months into the pandemic.
As u could already tell, Rahul and I started bonding over our break ups at this point lmao. We both decided we have to become level headed people and focus on our health and careers instead of putting so much of our energy into the wrong things. Altho they were broken up, we were all still friends and kept texting every day in the grp. Mohana took the break up really bad and her drinking n smoking habits increased, and once the lockdown was over she started to hook up w random guys to piss Rahul off. Since we were still friends, I told her to heal herself and focus on herself rn instead of seeking male validation and not to ruin her life. Granted she said I was talking like “her ex” and made a remark that we ( me n Rahul) should start dating since we think so similarly. Anyway things started to get rough between both of us. I really wanted her to get over her break up and better her own life but at one point i knew there was no point since she wasn’t gonna listen to me anymore.
People change and it’s fine. In my case tho, I changed as a person and the rest of my friends were stuck in the same mindset as they were during their 12th finals. That was the time when I started distancing myself from them becoz I couldn’t relate to their conversations anymore. And I’m not saying I’m superior to them or anything it’s just everyone has their own timing of maturing. Till this day I wish nothing but the best for all of them. But at that time it really felt like the right thing for me to do as I was focused on getting into a good clg, becoming fit both mentally and physically. Turns out the only ones I could relate to were Rahul and another best friend of mine from that group. Till this day they are my A1s.
Fast forward to few more months, Rahul and I really start getting closer. He went abroad for his studies and I got into my dream clg. Suddenly one night Rahul proposes me. It took me quite some time to digest it coz I was not expecting that at all. The first thing I did was text Mohana n let her know this whole thing. At this point we weren’t as close as before but we still knew what was going on in our lives. She was actually shocked at first n then started saying that she wasn’t and she always wanted us to date since we were a good match. Felt weird. I could clearly sense she wasn’t over him so I kept Rahul off for a few more months. During this time I would daily get texts from Mohana about us being a great couple and I should accept the proposal and that she doesn’t care abt him she is happy for us etc etc. strange thing she texted Rahul as well abt this and said I’m a great choice etc.
Well after 4-5 months of Rahul literally telling me how much he loves me and doing the sweeting things a man could, I finally realised that I liked him a lot too, and since just by default I always think of other people first and not put myself first, I kept forcing myself to think that I actually don’t like him. Well then, rest is history. We started dating, a lot of back bitching abt me started in my school group. Funny thing was Mohana turned instantly away from me the moment I started dating Rahul. She started spreading rumours about me that I was already into him when they were dating and she knew one day Rahul n I would date , that I’m such a horrible friend, I broke girl code, I don’t care abt her etc etc.
Well thing is, I genuinely did not care abt all that anymore. Altho it felt like the wrong decision and a “mistake” at first, later I was convinced everything happens for a reason. Rahul n I have been together for 4 years now. He turned out to be my best mistake. I have never been happier in my life whenever I am with him. Somehow he just gets me and loves me in a way I’ve never felt before. And thing is he has made me a better version of myself and I’m forever grateful to him for that. I went on having great friends in life and everything’s going great for both of our careers at the moment.
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Ofc after we started dating, Mohana and I completely lost touch and so did I with the other school friends. At times I really do miss the version of her pre Covid and reminisce all the memories we had. But alas, as I said, people change and we have to accept it. We still follow each other on social media and whenever I accidentally open her stories or see her posts, it’s still shady comments abt me. Like fr eg. just a few months back she posted a pic w the caption from Olivia rodrigos song “déjà vu” “..so when u gonna tell her, that we did that too, she thinks she’s special, but it’s all re used”. Yes. I’m not kidding. And this is not even 1/1000000th of the shady things she’s posted over these years I don’t even wanna get into all that it’s all really petty and disgusting, used to make me really sad at first but now I really don’t give a shit. I’m pretty sure she’s still not over this thing. And I don’t wanna pity her, I do understand her part it’s a tough pill to swallow when ur friend starts dating ur ex. But at the same time, I took a risk of being selfish for the first time and it has been the best thing ever for me.
I used to feel like I should apologise to her for all of this and then I realised I shouldn’t feel sorry for feeling loved and for loving someone. At times I really feel bad that she’s so hurt becoz of me, but I can’t really change what has happened as now I know it was meant to be. If anything I’m really grateful to her as I knew Rahul from her. So that’s it. I really hope she finds love and heals. I wish only the best for her. Just do not need someone like her in my life.