Im in a really difficult spot with my boyfriend. We’ve been together since late 2021, and recently he’s been second-guessing our relationship. I’m early twenties (F)and he’s mid twenties (M) and he recently brought up how he wasnt ready for marriage or kids, neither am I. A lot of our friends are getting engaged because they’re older and I guess he feels the pressure. He told me he feels like he needs space to grow and might want to move back home, which is about 3 hours away. If he decides to move home without me I would be forced to move out of our apartment and back to my parents house and i grew up in a very toxic household. (He has a lot of family trauma as well) We’ve lived together for about 1.5 yrs. Even though he’s put in notice to vacate our apartment, he still acts loving — we cuddle, spend time together, and he makes plans with me. He even talks about how we’d be great business partners “even if we weren’t together.” It feels like his words and actions don’t fully line up, which leaves me very confused and heartbroken.
Our lease is up in about a month and a half. I don’t want to give up on us. I feel like we have so many good things: peace when we’re together, support for each other’s goals, and genuine love. I’ve worked so hard to make our apartment a home, and I don’t want to leave it or him. I’ve suggested compromises like giving him more space (separate bedrooms, time apart, or me visiting home for a bit), but he’s still undecided. We agreed to have a deeper talk this Saturday about our future, but I’m terrified he’ll decide to end things. I don’t know if I should start preparing to move on or keep fighting for the relationship.
Also on when we have our deeper talk I don’t know how I’ll react if he says he wants to separate without a planned time to get back together. Our lease isn’t up for another month and a half and we will be living together and I’ll be heartbroken. Another thing to add is I just recently lost my job that he encouraged me to quit so I really will be screwed. Also if anyone has any advice on things to say on Saturday to help him see that he should stay.
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TL;DR; : how can I prepare for our conversation? Am I trying too hard when I should just give up?