I thought about divorcing my husband almost daily for the first three years after our daughter was born.
By the end of the third year, I was no longer constantly seething with resentment, but I still contemplated divorce on a weekly basis.
I still thought about divorce almost weekly during the fourth year, but I was willing to give it more time because it no longer seemed hopeless, if only because my husband panicked after I began apartment hunting, and realized that I was serious about the fact that I had no intention of staying married if I was going to be caring for a child all on my own, so I intended to file for divorce and demand that we split custody 50/50. I’d like to believe that he stepped up as a parent out of fear of losing me, but I suspect it was more out of fear of having to care for our child alone 50% of the time.
By the fifth year, my husband was on his way to becoming a good father. He was actually interested in spending time with our child, instead of seeing her as a burden to be handed off. Little by little, hope for our marriage began to return, and divorce no longer seemed necessary for my sanity.
Our daughter is 15 now. She’s very much a Daddy’s girl, and they are thicker than thieves. They play video games, build small electronics, and jam on the guitar together.
And our marriage? Stronger than ever, because we are back to being a team again. We love our daughter and one another, and are looking forward to the next stage of our lives as empty nesters.
It was definitely the hardest thing we ever went through as a couple. Our baby screamed constantly and didn’t sleep for 2.5 years. It was so so tough. But here we are 14 years later and still madly in love.
It turned it my ex never actually wanted to BE a parent; just knew i wanted a child and figured if we had one together i couldn’t leave no matter how poorly i was treated. Surprise! Watching my ex ignore our child is what motivated me to leave, because i couldn’t let her grow up being rejected in her own home, or thinking that the horrible relationship her parents had was a good model for marriage.
The marriage was bad before we had our daughter, i was just still in deep denial.
Yes, first 6 months with a baby and we almost divorced. Then we recovered, had another, went through another rough patch, but that one we expected so we didn’t take it so hard and we just waited it out. And here we are, happy with a toddler and a preschooler, and I imagine things will get even better from here since the bigger the childen are, the more time we can have for ourselves and each other.
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Yes and yes.
I thought about divorcing my husband almost daily for the first three years after our daughter was born.
By the end of the third year, I was no longer constantly seething with resentment, but I still contemplated divorce on a weekly basis.
I still thought about divorce almost weekly during the fourth year, but I was willing to give it more time because it no longer seemed hopeless, if only because my husband panicked after I began apartment hunting, and realized that I was serious about the fact that I had no intention of staying married if I was going to be caring for a child all on my own, so I intended to file for divorce and demand that we split custody 50/50. I’d like to believe that he stepped up as a parent out of fear of losing me, but I suspect it was more out of fear of having to care for our child alone 50% of the time.
By the fifth year, my husband was on his way to becoming a good father. He was actually interested in spending time with our child, instead of seeing her as a burden to be handed off. Little by little, hope for our marriage began to return, and divorce no longer seemed necessary for my sanity.
Our daughter is 15 now. She’s very much a Daddy’s girl, and they are thicker than thieves. They play video games, build small electronics, and jam on the guitar together.
And our marriage? Stronger than ever, because we are back to being a team again. We love our daughter and one another, and are looking forward to the next stage of our lives as empty nesters.
It was definitely the hardest thing we ever went through as a couple. Our baby screamed constantly and didn’t sleep for 2.5 years. It was so so tough. But here we are 14 years later and still madly in love.
Yes. It did not recover.
It turned it my ex never actually wanted to BE a parent; just knew i wanted a child and figured if we had one together i couldn’t leave no matter how poorly i was treated. Surprise! Watching my ex ignore our child is what motivated me to leave, because i couldn’t let her grow up being rejected in her own home, or thinking that the horrible relationship her parents had was a good model for marriage.
The marriage was bad before we had our daughter, i was just still in deep denial.
Yes, first 6 months with a baby and we almost divorced. Then we recovered, had another, went through another rough patch, but that one we expected so we didn’t take it so hard and we just waited it out. And here we are, happy with a toddler and a preschooler, and I imagine things will get even better from here since the bigger the childen are, the more time we can have for ourselves and each other.