I’m currently 28 with two kids, a newborn and 2 year old. I’m married to a lovely man who is so sweet and kind. However, financially this has been a tough year for us.
I’m the sole breadwinner, and I also help out my parents and siblings often. I’m also my children’s primary parent, especially the newborn as I’m breastfeeding.
I’m CONSTANTLY worried about the future. I sit and cry at night sometimes because I’m so anxious and fearful of life. How am I supposed to sustain this life I live? How am I suppose to continue? How can I help guarantee we will all be taken care of financially?
When you were younger, did you feel anxious about the future? Any advice now that you’re on the other side?
Comments
Yes. Please prioritize your family. You need to keep yourself healthy.
If something were to happen to you what would all these people do? I find it hard to believe they wouldn’t be able to figure something out.
A 28 year old needing to support 4 people and helping out at least four more is just too much – bluntly put.
Your feelings make sense, time for your family to recognize your humanity.
Some of what you’re feeling is natural, especially when you have younger kids because everything is so expensive. Toss in the fact, as you said, it’s been a financial tough year and you’re the sole breadwinner (hopefully temporarily!), well, that takes that natural stress and pushes it into overdrive. On top of it, I’m assuming that you’re helping out other family members financially as well? That’s a lot of dependency to have on just one person, not to mention a mom with two young kids. First thing I would do is actually get a bead on your budget. You have 2 kids that are going to have differing expenses over the years. Are you able, with what you’re doing now, to put money away for those expenses? If not, is there a way to put boundaries/limits on what you are spending on your parents and especially your siblings so that you can actually set aside money that can help reassure you that, even if you can’t plan out for everything, you have something to fall back on?
As sweet as it is, I’m not sure why you are in this position (if it’s financial help that is) with your family. Family does help each other in times of need but I do hope that they are also trying to help themselves.