We used to do a weekend camping trip with some of my husband’s friends. One friend mentioned at Christmas that maybe a lake house would be fun. My husband just decided to spearhead it.
I have experience finding vacation homes for rent so I look and put together a list. My husband finds one he loves. His criteria is essentially something on the lake with no visible homes nearby(ie. if the photos show homes next door) and something decently updated.
We need atleast four bedrooms because we have 4 couples coming including us and 2 single people. 2 of the 4 are only coming for a long weekend. The house my husband found is a 3 bedroom with 2 queen beds and a bunk room. My husband basically was like “full weekers get the bedrooms, weekenders get air mattresses” I tried gently saying that I thought there wasn’t enough bedrooms and my husband got a bit defensive. He sent the house out and everyone loved it. It’s $700 a night. He’s also concerned about booking and everyone bailing.
Do I continue to push and tell him he needs to let everyone know the bed situation?
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How many s he going to split the costs? The bunk room people obviously shouldn’t pay the same as someone with a private room.
How many bathrooms are there?
Wait. I just realized that’s 10 people. That doesn’t sound like fun at all.
He should get a % from everyone before he books & pays.
It depends how catastrophic you think it would be for this to be a learning opportunity.
Sometimes I let my husband learn the hard way. Like I nagged him when he moved in with me that if he left food in a certain section of the house it would attract ants. One day I saw him leave food there and I decided to just not say anything this time and let it be since only his stuff and not mine was stored there. Cue his panic the next day to find many ants all over his stuff. He never forgot again! His stuff was fine. It was just gross for him to deal with.
Other times if it’s more important than that, I will speak up because I do care about him and don’t want him to actually suffer.
Also people should send their money before booking. Not after.
Trying to put myself in your shoes from the sitch. above, I would say let him do it. If it doesn’t work out don’t shove it in his face but let him cool down and ask how HE felt he did. Bring something mundane up about the stay when you are ready to ask him, I would probably bring up the mattress and the kind of sleep I got. Let’s say he takes the bate and starts talking about the stay too, you can bring up looking for another place or renting this same one for next time. Maybe then he can express his disappointment and open up, he knew there was a risk of people bailing out and he should plan accordingly. Then if it DOES work out then it worked out.
I understand your concerns – maybe if y’all were in your 20s and broke yeah it makes sense to be as economical as possible, but most people that are older want their own bedroom. Either the friends didn’t fully grasp the bedroom situation when they looked at the house and “loved it” or maybe they just don’t care. It sounds miserable and as a single person I would be pissed to be put on an air mattress.
That said, you already brought up the issue and he got defensive. Apparently no one else has noticed the issue (or they are too shy to speak up which means they will probably bail).
Unfortunately it may be best to just let your partner learn the hard way when he finds himself on an air mattress because the other people didn’t want to do that.
If my fiancé and I had to pay $140+/night to sleep on an air mattress on the floor, I’d rather us just get our own hotel room (and not have to share two bathrooms between 10 people).
That sounds terrible. 10 people, 3 bedrooms, 2 regular beds & 1 bunk bed, the rest on air mattresses is a recipe for disaster. At minimum, I would accept 5 bedrooms, 4 with regular beds & if the 2 singles are okay with bunking together the 5th with bunk beds. Ideally, 6 bedrooms all regular beds. Paying more is better than everyone being on top of each other & the tensions that will inevitably cause.
Over communicating never hurt. If you think people aren’t aware of the bed situation then they need to know. Otherwise they may not be willing to shell out that money and will bail.
Just wondering, if he sent the house out and everyone else loved it, wouldn’t they be aware of the bedroom situation? Or does the ad not have details about the bedrooms?
Also not to laugh at the situation, but this sounds exactly like my friend group planning a weekend getaway haha.. totally been there!!
Edit: attempting to plan, its always chaos!
Based on your “welcome party” post, it looks like you are doing the same thing your mother would do
It’ll be fine, you’re not 60 and not going to a luxury hotel, it’s a lake house
You said “the guys” have seen it and haven’t raised an issue. So let it be and enjoy yourself!
Since they saw the listing and have a max that they’re willing to pay (saw on another comment), I would say just let it happen and let this either work out great or be s learning opportunity for everyone
Yes he needs to let everyone know the bed situation before booking!
I don’t understand what the issue is. This is people who are used to camping, so air mattresses and bunks are better than what they would have gotten otherwise. They’ve all seen the listing and signed off on it. It doesn’t sound fancy, but that doesn’t seem to be putting anyone else off. Let him do his thing, if it crashes and burns then whatever.
I mean, personally I’d pass on that. Like I’d tell my husband he can go without me.
There’s not enough beds or rooms. I’m not in highschool. I neither want to sleep on the floor or want anyone on my floor.
Accommodations are hella expensive for travel anywhere right now.
Tell him he needs to email/post the listing to a group chat before everyone agrees to it—and soon because these places book up fast.
It’s not fair to the couple who gets the bunk room or the single friends. They’d probably rather go on the camping trip at that point.
I’d push for him to reveal the sleeping situation and get everyone approval first tbh. Sure, maybe it’s a big deal, or maybe it totally makes sense and his friends understand the situation. It’s something I’d be totally fine with if I’m informed beforehand, but easily pissed off about when let know when I’m there and possibly tired/easier to be irritated. Being too clear doesn’t hurt in these situations 🤷♀️
You should just stress that before he books it his friends should confirm and say what night they are coming and agree on what everyone is paying. Even if they cancel they will pay unless someone else comes and covers them. Other than that, if it’s his friends, I’d just let him do it. This wouldn’t interest me, but if it’s his friends then I’d just let him make the mistake.