I don’t know how to say this, but there is this female colleague of mine. We are very good friends, I have always tried my best to keep it friendly at best even though I might have gone a little too friendly at times with her at a few occasions. I have hugged her a couple of times in the past as a friendly gesture. Also we had a falling out and didn’t speak for more than half a year until she asked me for help on a few things. In the mean time I was also starting another relationship and at the same time rumors started spreading about me and this colleague being in a relationship hence I suggested we keep a little distance and a little bit more professional because I also didn’t want to mess up the relationship that 8 was starting. Needless to say, the colleague wasn’t thrilled. 7 months later, I broke up with this girl that I was dating as it turned out to be a very toxic relationship itself and by some miracle the Colleague came back to ask me for help on an paper work issue. I also helped her with getting settled in a new apartment by carrying some furniture for her up to her apartment(thank God there was a kid that helped me do that). Anyway, she is 43 and I am 32 and that is a huge age gap so I don’t really want to date her and I am trying my best to keep it friendly but not too friendly, I am trying to maintain a distance and keep it professional. However, sometimes her behavior in my eyes indicates that she maybe has a crush on me. Now, I also know that she is very depressed, I can’t talk about it here as I don’t want to uncover some things about her and I try to be a friend but not too close, however I also can’t lie that I also have sexual attraction towards her and I know that I could maybe score with her but I also know that would’ve been first a very awful idea and second I would be taking advantage of someone’s vulnerability. Thank God I have not done any of those things but I feel like I need to vent the frustration and a part of me wishes we could just keep it casual but I know it is wrong and I hopefully won’t do it as I know I would feel extremely guilty of it.