I felt bad for the couple last of months. Getting thrown away by a girl I really liked and was my world, hurt me. I did not know how to keep going with my life and it seemed things wouldn’t get better, but it seems it does get better. I don’t care about her anymore, and not in a fake way. But I genuinely don’t care about what she thinks or do anymore. I have been going to work, watching series and just doing me. I used to try to go to the gym a lot of become the best just out of spite. However now everything I do is for me. I am still scared of growing, will I ever stop being scared of growing up? I don’t know. Working everyday all day sounds a little excessive to me. Does not sound as something I wanna do all the time, but I get some peace from it. At work I am just making money, seeing new people, and focusing on me. I don’t have to deal with her or school in general. Hopefully I am right and at some point that fear of growing up will go away.
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