I’m in the U.S. on an H1B visa. My wife is on an H4 dependent visa. We’ve been married for over 8 years and have a toddler who was born here.
I recently discovered that she has been unfaithful. I have solid evidence, but have not confronted her yet. She is currently a stay-at-home mom with no income. I am the sole provider and also cover our family’s health insurance.
Here’s where I need strategic legal advice:
- Her visa is tied to our marriage. If we separate or divorce, she will lose her H4 status unless she finds another legal basis to stay. Does her loss of status affect her eligibility for custody or spousal support? Would a U.S. court still grant custody or alimony to someone who becomes undocumented or leaves the country?
- I want full or primary custody. I’ve started preparing for that—looking into daycare, hiring part-time help, and planning a smaller home. I also have a flexible tech job. What can I do before filing to strengthen my custody case?
- I’m concerned about alimony. We’re getting close to the 10-year marriage mark, which I heard could lead to long-term support in California. If I legally separate before the 10-year mark, will that help limit exposure?
- Financial protection. Most of my savings are offshore (non-U.S. accounts), and I want to avoid a situation where she tries to claim half. What steps can I take now to keep my assets protected before filing for divorce?
I know this is complicated due to the immigration angle, and I’m aware courts try to separate immigration from family law—but practically speaking, I wonder if her lack of status would weaken her claims, especially if she has to leave the U.S.
Any advice or shared experience—especially from those who’ve been through a divorce involving immigration issues—would be deeply appreciated. Thank you.
Location: California