Drained

Advice

Hi, 30 year old woman here. This will somewhat be a long post. Trying to gain my age back. Need a mom 🥲

My mother was abused as a child in all ways and so was I. She is very controlling even now. Any lick of any opening she will start to abuse her power on me and start to take over or start a smear campaign. From a young child I was told I was crazy and that I’d end up locked away in a psych ward. Low and behold I had my first psychosis episode of my life a few months ago just for her to tell me at the doctors in front of the doctor that my father is bipolar. Mind you she hasn’t heard from him since he was 18 and she was 21. She is the one that filled out SSI paperwork with him after he was diagnosed at 18. Anyways, am I wrong for being pissed she never told me this? I’ve been married, had two kids etc. that was very important information. She has told me to leave a good man and I did now she tells me I shouldn’t of left and I’m crazy for that all because she said he was talking bad about me to her and others (total lie). She ruined my life and I let her. I am thinking of doing a life coach or something because therapy is not cutting it. I had no mood swings just depression before psychosis. Now she took away my oldest son because of it and my youngest is with his father and he is maybe bitter I left (understandable but still wrong.) my oldest son is autistic so I can’t just maneuver and move away from her I do need help but not a dictatorship. SHE TOLD THE DOCTOR I NEVER REMEMBER WHAT DAY IT IS AND THAT I left my son in the house and went out when really she came in yelling and I went to my car and videoed me after she jumped in front of my car as if I was trying to hit her then called the police on me. I don’t know what to do. She even calls and texts my abusive ex husband videos and pics of our son and tells him I was in a psych ward etc. I never acted crazy with him and we stopped being together at 21 years old. He was very abusive and told everyone everything he did was what I did. He is crazy I’m just bipolar now lol. But seriously what the fuck. She even gave away all my furniture when I was in there now I have nothing and she says I can’t take care of my child because of that. Any ideas based on this? If I move again it would mean taking him out of school district again.
Sorry it’s so long. Live in a rural area in Maryland. Not much here. Stepdad even worse wants to adopt my son and they lie on me he is a counselor that shouldn’t be so he says he sees demons in me or depression whichever he feels like a pastor or a counselor that day.