Hi guys! me and this guy have been dating for over a year now, and we are very sexual. but i had an incident before i met him which has caused us to not have actual SEX. we’ve done everything else you can imagine.
anyway, last night we were getting to it and i told him not to not cum in me because i didn’t like it which he 100% respected. i then said can u put a condom on becuase it feels less if that makes sense? he laughed and said never in his life will he wear a condom.
i got my stuff and got up and left and haven’t replied to him at all. i want to be with someone who respects sexual boundaries but becuase of my past am i being toooo extreme?
Comments
No. He doesn’t respect your wishes. Find someone that will.
Not, not at all. Protection is important as are your boundaries. If he doesn’t want to wear a condom, then he doesn’t get you. It’s that simple.
You’ll find someone that respects you. Just keep looking and good luck.
You made the right choice, he sounds like a nut job. In future, though, you already know that condoms prevent against much more than just pregnancy. If you’re sleeping with anybody, especially someone who’s happy to have sex with a new partner without a condom, you should be getting regular STI checks, and frankly I’d refuse to have sex without a condom with someone who isn’t my partner anyway. Mediocre sex ain’t worth risking your health. He sounds riddled if he’ll “never wear a condom in his life”. Go get tested ASAP.
No n him saying he never puts a condom on is pretty concerning
Imagine thinking latex is more comfortable than completely disregarding your partner’s comfort.
You’re allowed to outgrow people who don’t grow with you, especially when they ignore boundaries you made for a reason
You’ve done exactly the right thing. It’s a risk for him too, so anyone who doesn’t respect & protect his own health certainly won’t respect and protect yours.
dodged a bullet
You are not being too extreme. You are simply expressing your needs and what is important to you.
As I frequently tell my own daughter, if a guy does not respect your thoughts and feelings, then you need to kick him to the curb and move on as soon as possible.
There’s not really more to discuss.
I hope that helps.
You must have some serious issues to do that to a guy you were seeing for a year, do you not care about him? He made an instinctual reaction, not a great onee of course, but to ‘kick him to the curb’ as so many of you brow beaten women here tell you to do, without talking to him, that’s a poor move and one that won’t bring any future happiness. I’d advise you that you came to Reddit for validation, not the truth, you might want to look into that.
So you were having sex without a condom and then you said he needed to put one on before he came? I mean, that’s fine and all, but why not just have both of you get tested, then do whatever you both want?
Especially, as you are having anal, that is such a good compromise…. I know in Brazil it is often used as contraception as having a huge roman catholic population.
NTA
Not being extreme. He crossed your boundaries and you did the right thing. Good for you!
How refreshing to see someone on Reddit aware of their own boundaries and who enforced them, Even In the Heat of the moment!
You 100% did the correct thing. Someone with that attitude has no respect for you, or anyone, for that matter. Your health and safety, never mind your responsibilities for the next 18 to 21 years, are more important than his momentary pleasure.
>Ended it because he said he’d never wear protection?
This was the perfect response.
I wish more women would do this when confronted with a lunatic who cares very little for their girl.
Your body your choice.
Kick him to the Kirb. He’s for the streets.
Advice: Don’t date idiots
The fuck do you think.
Run, you’ve done the right thing 🙂
Been there, done that. Unfortunately, I had to deal with a similar scumbag as well in my life, and it was one of the most humiliating things I ever experienced.
When someone doesn’t care about your sexual health and boundaries he’s literally telling you that he doesn’t respect you and only cares about his own pleasure. Please, block this worm and never allow him back into your life.
You are doing well to stick to your boundaries. You were right to walk away from this sad excuse of a man.