i’ve talked about my now ex in couple of posts in the past, deleted most of them tho but long story short: i never felt comfortable around him like there always was the gut feeling / instincts telling me to run. I later found out he had a history of alcoholism, being abusive both physically and emotionally, racist, cheating, p0rn addict, etc.
I also realized all his “compliments” and “humor” was not okay and dangerous, constantly brought up how obsessed he was with me being innocent and pure (no experience), getting me pregnant, kept insisting i move in, poked fun and “playfully” bullied me about things like how i was a dirty italian / guido, too weak to fight him just so much shit about me being young and dumb
there is a lot more im not saying but i recently started talking with a new guy in my summer class who made me realize i can do better. He constantly makes me laugh without putting me or others down, has respect for people, passionate about school and playing baseball, calls out bs and i just overall get such a safe and secure environment from him and not like im walking on eggshells
So, after i realized my feelings were growing stronger and wanted to be with him instead, i ended it with him, literally this morning it was over text, he was pissed and said some shit about how he saw this coming because i was too perfect for him anyways and he will continue being a lone wolf all his life
i was surprised he took it better than i thought because he has sense of evil in him lol….i was right.
This afternoon I went to the park picnic that my job (daycare) hosted for everyone (employees, parents and their children) and i thought it would be cute to bring the new guy im seeing and i didn’t regret it at all because he was so interactive with everyone, playing with kids, helping with food just so genuine and extroverted
Until he showed up :/ my heart dropped literally dropped, he came in stomping, drunk yelling at me saying stuff like how you knew this was the guy i left him (i brought him up once to him), that i never really loved him but what really made me start sobbing uncontrollably is when he started mentioning sexual stuff like how i was a slut and how hard it was for him that i kept him waiting to have sex and now im not even going to lose my virginity to him but to a “little boy” referring to the baseball guy, it just went on and on
before he finally got dragged out by one of the parents he screamed about out how much hes going to picture me getting railed by the new guy every night
i’ve never felt so paralyzed in my life and i don’t think i can ever go back to work either, i left immediately and haven’t spoken to the new guy since then even tho he keeps texting and calling. idk how to move on from this
TDLR: ex bf crashed my work picnic, yelling at me while i was with a new guy
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Speak to an attorney get a cease and desist issued on him & talk to the cops about him stalking you plus file a police report, he is verbally abusing you. Get a therapist as well.
Your ex showed up drunk and belligerent. That’s not on you. You don’t need to move on. He showed his ass where it didn’t belong.
Don’t alienate your new guy. He sounds like a keeper.
Therapy. Talk with the new guy, your employer, your parents and your friends. Breathe.
SO, are you and the 29m still together? Im asking because you have a few recent posts that state you are still with him and having feelings for someone else.
So did you dump this guy the same day you brought the new guy to the picnic? I mean your post history and this story sort of indicates you just switched out boyfriends.
Don’t be embarrassed about going to work. That scene he made wasn’t your fault.
Speak to an attorney and possibly file a police report. You did nothing wrong and honestly good on you learning from an early age to stay away from men like that. You’d be surprised how many women continue to stay with men like that.
Explain to the new guy you want nothing to do with your ex and you’re sorry for putting him in that situation. I’m sure he will understand and he also probably feels really bad for you!
What ever you do, if for what ever reason it doesn’t work out between you and the new guy (now or later) DO NOT get back with the ex. This happens more than you think and it never ends well. All the best!
I am so sorry that happened. If I had witnessed this my thoughts would be more on “wtf is wrong with that guy” and not on you. I hope that helps.
You have zero to be ashamed about, especially as you were cautious enough not to sleep with this idiot. New guy is probably impressed by that as well as sympathetic over this idiot’s general behavior. Don’t hide or be embarrassed. Hold your head high—you deserve to.
I have no idea why you dumped this new guy. Why would you end a potentially good thing? Why are you jetting your psycho ex run your life? Ignore him, call new guy, apologize for not thinking straight, continue dating him and move on with your life.
Why didn’t anyone call the cops?
You’ve done nothing wrong, your stance should be “yeah, my ex is a nightmare, I’m glad I found the courage to end it with him”.
Talk to your new guy, I’m sure it’s not as bad as you think it is between you both.
As for your co-workers, I guess it depends on what occurred in front of them & their kids. You should probably send them an apology explaining what a toxic sack of shit your ex is.