i’m honestly shaking writing this. a while back when i was dating my ex, i sent him some private photos. they weren’t explicit full nudes but definitely intimate! lingerie, suggestive, very personal. he was always taking artsy photos and i trusted him.
we broke up a few months ago and haven’t spoken at all. i thought it was done. then someone sent me a link to an online gallery from an art show he’s in. my photos are there. edited in black and white, but it’s clearly me. face showing, tattoos visible, my body unmistakable. he didn’t blur anything or crop it.
i never said he could use them like that. he didn’t ask. there’s even an option to buy prints. i had no idea until someone recognized me and told me. i felt sick.
i texted him to take them down and at first he ignored me. when he finally replied he just said he thought it was “art” and didn’t see why i’d be upset. he’s acting like i’m overreacting.
i don’t know what to do. i feel so humiliated knowing strangers can buy my photos without me ever agreeing. i can’t really afford an expensive lawyer right now but i need to do something.
can i force him to take them down everywhere? what about the prints that already sold? is there anything i can do to stop this? i feel so violated and stupid for ever trusting him. any advice would mean a lot.
Location: Texas
Comments
It could be considered revenge porn. Ask the police. Or at a minimum, it’s using your image for commercial reasons without your, the model’s, permission. Most lawyers will give you a free initial consultation. Hit some up.
NAL, but i’d maybe start with contacting the gallery or the host site, something similar? also TX’s “Unlawful Disclosure of intimate visual materials” might apply here, so i would absolutely reach out to your local PD and ask about options ASAP. like today or tomorrow.
in the meantime, i am an SA survivor. what you’re going through is traumatic and violating and i highly recommend having a good support network and even a therapist to talk to. what this man has done to you is absolutely deplorable, and you have every right to feel violated, taken advantage of, and hurt. he had no right to your body like this, and i am so very sorry you’re going through this.
NAL:
He’s definitely gaslighting you as if it’s “crazy” for you to not want intimate photos posted without your consent.
Texas offers protections against this exact thing. Tell him you seemed legal advice and found out the following:
“Texas Penal Code § 21.16 – “Unlawful Disclosure or Promotion of Intimate Visual Material”
Doesn’t require full nudity — images just need to be intimate, taken under the assumption they were private.
It’s illegal to disclose or promote those images without consent, especially if the person is identifiable.
Look up some “cease-and-desist” letters to request that he immediately stop.
I would imagine that he would not want to die on this hill. If it was me I’d want no part of that.
It’s revenge porn.
Even if it were non-nakey pics, he would still need a model release to use them.
If you don’t pursue this legally, you can still let the gallery know he doesn’t have a release.
As long as they are not sexually explicit, normally, the photographer owns the rights to the photos, not the subject. This even includes a photographer you hire for a photo shoot. The customer almost never owns the images and has very little control of their use.