F22 and M22 advice on expectations

Hi everyone, I (F 22) have been struggling in my relationship with my boyfriend (M, 22) and we’ve been dating for 3 years

The one thing I’ve consistently asked of him and I always let him know a week in advance is to be there for me the night before I have a big test. I’ve been struggling with anxiety lately, and having his support that night makes a huge difference for me. This isn’t something I spring on him last minute; I give him the dates ahead of time.

Despite that, this is the 4th time I’ve reminded him about this and the 4th time he’s failed to follow through. Each time, he says he thought I’d be okay with him doing something else for a couple of hours that he enjoys, since he thinks he’s “there for me every day otherwise.” Keep in mind I would not care or mind at all if he wasn’t there any other night at all. He apologizes and tells me he loves me, but it feels like he’s minimizing how important this actually is to me.

This isn’t just about the test nights, either. There have been multiple occasions where I’ve been crying and begging him to be there, and instead he’s left. He says he “hates seeing me cry,” but then avoids it. When I point this out, he calls it a mistake, but after it happens repeatedly, it feels like a conscious choice.

Now he’s very apologetic, saying he loves me, wants to marry me, wants our relationship, etc. But to me, words don’t erase the fact that when I’ve needed him the most, he hasn’t been there even after I’ve been clear and specific about what I need. Keep in mind because we aren’t always in the same city and our schedules there aren’t many moments to even be there for each other so it isn’t a situation of maybe feeling like I’m too needy, at least I don’t think. Also don’t get me wrong he is a loving boyfriend and very sweet and a good person in general. However am I just supposed to have faith that things will magically change in the hypothetical we get married in the future? Ik we are still young but once we’re of age I mean or is this irrational and not something I should expect?

So here’s my question:

What advice do you have for handling a partner who repeatedly doesn’t show up in the ways you’ve clearly asked for? How would this situation make other people feel?How can I move forward from this

Any outside perspective would mean a lot. Btw sorry for the grammatical error in the caption!

TL;DR: My boyfriend has repeatedly failed to show up when I’ve asked for support (especially the night before big tests that I tell him about a week in advance). This is the 4th time. He apologizes but doesn’t change. He’s also left me crying multiple times despite saying he “hates seeing me cry.” How do I handle this situation and move forward? Please read full thing!