We all know that the holidays with in-laws are basically a competitive sport where the prize is keeping your blood pressure below stroke levels. There is always a little bit of tension, especially when you are newly married. But for one woman on Reddit, her first Christmas as a wife wasn’t just awkward; it was a masterclass in passive-aggressive bigotry followed by the most delicious, petty revenge I have ever seen.
Our narrator is a woman who married her wife, Lia, just two months ago. They are newlyweds. They should be in the honeymoon phase. But Lia’s mom has a “problem” with the OP. She suspects it is because Lia is bis*xual and the mom is harboring some dusty, outdated wish that her daughter had ended up with a man. It is the kind of quiet, simmering disapproval that usually manifests in backhanded compliments, but this year, Mom decided to go loud.
The scene is the family Christmas gathering. Everyone is there. The tree is lit, the eggnog is flowing, and it is time for the obligatory family photo. Now, usually, “family” includes the people your children legally married. But when the group gathered, the mother-in-law turned to the OP and dropped the hammer. She said, “OP, we want the photos to be family only.”
Lia, being a good partner, immediately protested, reminding her mother that they are literally married. But the OP, wanting to keep the peace and avoid a screaming match next to the roast beast, agreed to step out. She even volunteered to take the picture.
But here is where the MIL’s logic falls apart faster than cheap wrapping paper. This wasn’t a “blood relatives only” photo. Lia’s sister’s husband was there. The cousin’s wife was there. Every other spouse was grinning in the frame. The only person excluded was the wife in the same-s*x couple. The message wasn’t subtle; it was a neon sign screaming intolerance.
The OP stood there, holding the camera, looking at a group of people who didn’t think she belonged. And in that moment, she made a choice. She didn’t throw the camera. She didn’t cry. She decided that if they didn’t want her in the picture, she was going to make sure they weren’t really in the picture either.
She proceeded to take 30 of the worst photographs in human history. She didn’t just mess up a little; she committed to the bit. She focused the lens on the upholstery instead of their faces. She zoomed in uncomfortably close on random features. She used the flash at the most unflattering moments. She waited until people were coughing, blinking, or looking away. She shook her hands to ensure maximum blur. It wasn’t a skills issue; it was a directional choice.
She handed the camera back with a sweet smile, expressing hope that they would find a “nice one to frame.” It is the kind of chaotic good energy that deserves a standing ovation.
Later that night, Lia was furious on her wife’s behalf, as she should be. But when the OP revealed her sabotage, anger turned into hysterics. They snuck downstairs, reviewed the digital carnage, and laughed until they cried. Lia, the real MVP, even went through and deleted the few photos that accidentally turned out okay. That is true love. That is partnership.
They are now just waiting for the inevitable phone call when the MIL uploads the photos to her computer and realizes her Christmas memories look like they were taken during an earthquake by a toddler. The OP plans to plead ignorance about how to use a DSLR camera, which is the perfect, unprovable defense.
So, is she the ahole? Absolutely not. N-T-A. The MIL tried to erase her daughter-in-law from the family, so the daughter-in-law erased the family from the photos. It is poetic justice. If you want a picture-perfect family moment, maybe start by treating your actual family with basic respect. Otherwise, enjoy your framed photo of the living room sofa and your nephew’s left ear.