I am 32 yrs old pretty much have it all a relationship, college education, good relationship with my parents, self employed but most days I’m just very bored and unhappy. Most of the time I am alone in my car driving to construction sites alone. Have you ever felt bored or unhappy?
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Having it all is such an interesting term. A lot of people use that as a marker of success. It sounds like you’re missing passion and purpose.
I think it’s very easy to fall into the cyclical nature of life without stopping to actually enjoy what’s around us.
I sure have, especially when driving the same route in a car, day after day. It’s perfectly normal to feel bored by that dull routine.
I listen to audiobooks, and I vary my route, even if it is longer, so that it’s more bearable.
Are you doing for others? I don’t mean making faceless donations. I’m talking about you personally doing good things for people who can’t repay you. Helping build a ramp on a an elderly or handicapped persons house. Making a grocery run for a neighbor. Making sure someone gets to a dr appt. I’m not saying every week, but regularly.
Those things take time and sacrifice, but I’m willing to bet if you can do that kind of thing, you’ll be more thankful for the blessings you have. And you may be tired, but also fairly certain you won’t be bored.
Yeah. Sounds like your job might not suit your temperament, some people would thrive in that environment; other people would find it isolating.
Yes I’ve felt bored and unhappy. I’m human. Keep in mind that trying to force yourself to not have negative feelings can cause what you’re trying to avoid.
Being bored and unhappy happens. We all experience those states of being. We don’t want to stay in those states, however. I once heard someone describe depression as “the sound of your soul knocking.” You may want to explore what is missing from your life and make changes to feel more alive.
Everyone sometimes feels bored and unhappy. Time to change things up. Go new places, meet new people, do new things. Nobody has it all. Stop thinking in those terms. Look to make changes that make you feel happy and engaged.
No, but we can get trapped in routine and feel like it’s mundane and bla , like is this IT . That’s where changing things up helps, new routine, new hobby, volunteer work.
Time for a family? Will give u purpose. There really isn’t much else as u get older. I mean u can try to do fun things but that gets old also. Your family will bring meaning forever. Plus u then actually have to keep busy to care for another person or persons. Happiness comes and goes, this is why pursuing meaning is more lasting or brings more longterm fullfillment.
To me, happiness equals not being bored so I understand what you mean. Nothing is worse than being bored with life, at least for me.
I have learned to fight off boredom/unhappiness in a couple of ways. First, learn how to embrace change and if there isn’t enough change in your life, make some. I am not saying get a divorce and move to another country. But find a job that has a lot of variety to it. Or a job with a clear path towards advancement. Even look around your job and see what’s not working and come up with a plan to fix it.
Avoid the same restaurants, bars or other entertainments. Find new places or go to places you know of but have never tried. Change up your diet and exercise. Not just once, but whenever the sameness starts creeping in.
The other thing that helps me is to continually keep learning. If there is something you have always been curious about, take the time to figure it out. I can get totally absorbed in learning about a subject I know nothing about, whether it is art history, physics, or gardening. I am not an expert on any subject, it nothing sets my imagination off like knowing about something that was a total mystery to me.
And read. Reading engages your mind far more than movies or TV. Nothing gets me out of a slump quicker than a reading journey.
A therapist once told me that my equation of happiness and not being bored, wasn’t the healthiest definition he had ever heard. But that I was in great company. He thought what drove many explorers, scientists and artists throughout history was the need to shake things up to avoid boredom.
I would posit that you don’t have it all. You seem to think you have what other people think is “all”. But, what do you think is ” all”. Once you find that out, you may find a cure to your boredom.
Just unhappy, never bored
Find a community! There are a lot of different ways and types that you can look into. I liked line dancing, anyone can do it and you have a choice about who you want to talk to. My friend went for a religious group called Unity. It’s national and very upbeat and a lot of fun! Also Unitarian, Center for Spiritual Living is a very good community and resource.
Helping others, big brothers/sisters Also, showing dogs, learning to sail, wine tasting or bowling! Just find your tribe and thrive!
First steps: Make sure you’re getting on exercising every day. If you’re driving around, then you really need to make sure that your car in that time with some activity. Whether it’s an individual sport, working out at the gym, swimming, yoga, walking, make sure there’s at least a 45 minute spot each day to do it. Doing so will increase your endorphins, boost your energy and help you think.
Helping other people gives your life meaning. That’s why most people become parents.
An easy way to help others is by giving away things on a buy nothing facebook group. Gives me a little boost every time. And yes, I feel unhappy sometimes. Hugs.
Fill your driving time with audio books. Pick a subject that interests you and do a deep dive.
Boredom is usually the result of not doing new things.
In college, were there any classes that intrigued you but didn’t fit your schedule? Check YouTube, Coursera, and The Great Courses. My late husband took YouTube guitar lessons and was fascinated with plumbing videos.
What did you like to do as a kid? Do it now. You have a career, so you don’t have to be good at it. Go make crappy art! Write a bad novel! Run the world’s slowest 5k! Your art and writings will be better than what the guy watching Netflix makes. The slowest runner across the finish line still got there faster than the guy who never left his couch. And if you’re having fun, you’ll improve.
Have you been to every quirky museum within a 50 mile radius? Museums aren’t just art. There are railroad, flight, firefighter, and historical museums. I just googled my area and discovered there’s a 20th Century Technology museum and now I’m freaking out! What’s near you?
Even when you can’t take a vacation, there are road trip and walking tour videos on YouTube. Get some Chinese food on the way home and watch a walking tour of the Great Wall of China. Order a pizza and watch a walking tour of the Roman forum.
The key thing is to get creative. Work to live, don’t live to work, because that’s what’s boring.