I currently have NC with my MIL as she’s covert, but husband still talks to her. My question is, how do you deal with her flying monkeys? Obviously they side with MIL, she pretty much convinced them that I’m the villain in our story, yet during calls, pretends to be concerned about me. My husband says pay no mind and just live our life because he’s already banned them from visiting. What would you do?
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Go NC with the monkeys too. All you really need is each other.
i would listen to how my husband wants to handle it and then i would do that.
Good for him! 🙌
Not answer the phone is what I would do.
Anyone who would take her side is not on your side. Seems simple enough. Block and move on.
Stop trying to win them over. They’re not your audience. Live your life like your husband says.
Easy for your husband to say “pay no mind” when it’s not his name being dragged thru the mud. I get that he’s trying, but he married YOU! He needs to put an end to this, or he’s going to lose you. He’s clearly fine with you being shat on… Is that how you wanna live?
Cut them all off, they’re not worth having in your life. Block, move on and focus on those who are kind and supportive.
Your husband is a flying monkey too
Ask him not to use speaker phone when talking to them, and leave the room where he’s having the call. He can grey rock when they ask about you.
Honestly dude, I’d say trust ur hubby on this 1. Stuff gets messy with fam betraying each other’s trust, but u got ur dude w/ you and that’s the real win, IMO. Worrying ’bout the FM gets you nowhere. Just do ur thing, live ur best life with ur man & show ’em that ur above this nonsense. Ppl usually see the truth eventually, and if they don’t…well, their loss. Stay strong, fam!
Flying monkeys always reveal who they really are. If they believe MIL’s lies that easily, they were never on your side.
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Your husband has the right idea, “ pay no mind” and live your life. Peace > drama.
Think of flying monkeys like spam emails, you don’t read them, you don’t reply, you just hit block.
What I’d do? Document everything, stay NC, and let their drama bounce off your peace.
I agree with your husband. Ignore them. They want a response
The monkeys give up eventually. MIL cries and complains to them and dumps her toxic spew on them until they’re overwhelmed and try to help placate her by forcing you back into line to take her toxic spew. When you ignore them or stay calm and like a brick wall in their presence, they go away. Don’t engage. Don’t JADE. You don’t need them to believe you or accept your position. Just live your life the good person that you are.Â
Eventually the monkeys get sick of the toxic sludge from MIL and distance themselves. They get over their expectations of you and save themselves. MIL will find a new favorite target, but she’ll hoover.
Don’t engage with them and eventually they’ll get sick of being involved with someone else’s drama and if they don’t you block and move on cause they’re as delusional as MIL is