Married at 28 to a woman who is the same age (we were friends at undergrad college), parents at 30. We are 46 now. Life was tough back then, but we got through on laughter, love, commitment, …and lots of hard work.
Today, life is easier (no bed of roses, there are always stressors) and we are proud parents to a 16 year old boy who is a well mannered, sensitive, and kind hearted human being. When we see some of our 40+ friends struggle with toddlers, we are like, “Phew…so glad we got thru all of that early in our lives!”
Sometimes it feels like we gave up a lot in our 30s, but I think in balance, it was sooo worth it. We are less stressed about the future, can legit dream (fingers and toes crossed and not to jinx it) of retiring a bit early, and spending the rest of our lives together.
Circumstances and occasional cruel fate aside, it all depends on what two people decide to make out of life… together.
First kid at 22, second at 24 and third at 26. Divorced after 17 years of marriage and have 50/50 custody and kept everything after the divorce. They’re with me 80-90% of the time, been divorced a little over 2 years. Trying to keep my mental up for them, missing physical touch and talking to someone when getting home from work. Other than that I’m doing good, single parent shit aint for the weak, shit is challenging but wouldnt change it, way better off now.
Was 20 with my first (hes an engineer now). Was making minimal wage back then. Married the mom at 24 separated by 25. Decided it was time to party and blew any savings I had.
Remarried at 35, second and third at 36 and 38.
We’re all good but alot of bumps in the past 29years
Great now my youngest is 24 and I’m divorced from their mom
17-42 were a fucking hard slog but once I freed myself from the financial black hole that is their mother
Paid off my house (twice) got good savings, good job, got promoted twice post divorce
I can retire at 58 in 6 years
I never had a day from leaving school where I stayed in my own place, once I manged to grease my ex wife out of the house, I finally realised how wonderful living alone can be
8 years from the split and my desire to have someone in my life (and house) is still welded at zero
I causally date until they realise I’m not changing my stance for them, have a few female freinds now that give me the few hours of male female socialising a week that tops that battery up
The plan when I had kids so young (baby trap but such is life) was to start enjoying life ince they were adults and self suffient
That would have come at 42 but my ex wife wanted to cash in soon as I’d paid off the mortgage and she could get her half
So it took another 3 years paying her off but the moment I did, my life switched to seriously easy mode
First kid at 21, she 20. Second at 25 she 24. Honestly? I hate to be that guy based on all the other comments but life is good. The kids are 15 and 11 now and her and I have been married for over 8 years living together for 13.
It was hard in the beginning. We lived at home for the 1st 2 years and it almost drove us apart. Now that the kids are older we have so much more time together and doing stuff with the kids is easier too since they’re adolescents. All of the couples that started around the same time we did are now getting divorced and it’s such a sad thing but her and I talk a lot about how we don’t ever want that for us. I don’t have a secret to what’s made it work other than communication and I’ve always prioritized our relationship and she does the same. I guess we got lucky that we found each others person and with having a family baked into it, it’s enabled us to truly appreciate what we have. I hope that never changes but we’ve also openly talked about going to couples counseling if at anytime in the future we can’t talk through our own problems. I hope everyone that wants it gets to find their person.
Not sure what you consider young but my wife and I had our first when I was 24 and she was 21. Then our 2nd when I was 26 and she was 23.
Everything is going so badly now, but for me personally. My wife is experiencing some of the best career success of her life. My daughter and son are so don’t with school this year. With 24? School days left they’re practically frothing at the mouth for summer time.
Having kids early was difficult, but now it’s truly a gift. My kids are so much more active and want to do things and go places and I’m not 40 years old trying to keep up. My parents had kids late. My dad was 40 when I turned 7. My sister just had her first at 37 and she says it’s really difficult.
I didn’t understand at first then I remembered that taking care of an infant is pretty easy when you’re still in your prime.
Its pretty fantastic. I lost access to them during the divorce. The divorce took longer to get through than the marriage lasted. But I got 50/50. Then when they were 13 they wanted to come live with me. That court battle lasted 2 years. They’re 20 now and still living and working with me.
Not me, but good friend’s exgf tossed her pill rt before he left for military. Yup. You know. He did ‘honorable’ thing by marrying her. Popped 2nd kid before he turned 21 ircc. He said it was tough. But he essentially had child free house in early 40s
My oldest was born when I was 31, which I don’t know is ‘early’… Suppose if my wife at the time was younger we could have waited longer, but it seemed to be a good time to me. Seems these days a lot of guys think it makes more sense to wait and find a younger women to have a family with… I wouldn’t do that myself.
I’m 50 now, my two sons are my pride & joy: no two ways about it.
Only downside really was second pregnancy / birth had serious complications for my wife and ended up being pretty devastating to her long term health. She survived but the cost was high, and in a way contributed to our (amicable) divorce, which was a bit sad, but life rolls on. I see it this way, and hundred years ago, my wife and child would have died in childbirth, plain and simple, so… I don’t complain.
Either way I know neither of us could imagine life without our sons…
Was 24 when my first came along. Due to the pregnancy I married a bitch I wasn’t in love with. At 25 my second was born, with a girl I was seeing outside of my shitty marriage. At 27 my last was born, with my second wife. My oldest and I were forbidden to see each other until she was fifteen and her mother couldn’t handle her. Then she moved in with me, my wife, and my son. She straightened out and we have a close relationship. My other daughter came to stay with us every summer. We have an occasional phone call and holiday visits relationship. My son is in college and still lives at home. He is my best friend.
Had a kid when I was 19, applied to the oilfields in Texas with a job at Walmart and my child’s mother’s car to my name, worked my ass off until I was 31 (right now) and now I own a home and see her whenever she wants to come over. I split with her mom about 1 year in so I just paid child support that entire time and we get along fine.
Soon to be divorced dad. I thought I had it all and that I was lucky to have had my child early.
What I didn’t know is that people change over time, and while my wife was the loveliest person when I met her, she became someone completely different over time.
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Became a father at 28, to a mother who was 23.
I’m a single father now with full custody. Life is a drag but it is so so rewarding that I wouldn’t have it any other way.
Paying child support for a kid I don’t see. Sleeping out of my car because I can’t live in the house I bought with my own money. But life’s good …
Not me, but 2 different people I knew from middle school became grandparents at 36 & 41. That was 16 years ago.
Married at 28 to a woman who is the same age (we were friends at undergrad college), parents at 30. We are 46 now. Life was tough back then, but we got through on laughter, love, commitment, …and lots of hard work.
Today, life is easier (no bed of roses, there are always stressors) and we are proud parents to a 16 year old boy who is a well mannered, sensitive, and kind hearted human being. When we see some of our 40+ friends struggle with toddlers, we are like, “Phew…so glad we got thru all of that early in our lives!”
Sometimes it feels like we gave up a lot in our 30s, but I think in balance, it was sooo worth it. We are less stressed about the future, can legit dream (fingers and toes crossed and not to jinx it) of retiring a bit early, and spending the rest of our lives together.
Circumstances and occasional cruel fate aside, it all depends on what two people decide to make out of life… together.
I’m 50 in a few weeks. Became a dad at 23. Divorced at 24.
Kids 26, lives intestate but we chat most days online. Sometimes play online too.
I couldn’t be prouder.
First kid at 22, second at 24 and third at 26. Divorced after 17 years of marriage and have 50/50 custody and kept everything after the divorce. They’re with me 80-90% of the time, been divorced a little over 2 years. Trying to keep my mental up for them, missing physical touch and talking to someone when getting home from work. Other than that I’m doing good, single parent shit aint for the weak, shit is challenging but wouldnt change it, way better off now.
My wife and I have been together since we were kids. Getting married and having kids young wasn’t rough as it was what we wanted albeit early.
Now the kids are older and we aren’t getting our asses hammered by all the required responsibilities we are really happy.
We are in our 30s now and most of our friends have gotten married multiple times now so we are at least doing something right if we are still happy.
First kid at 22. They have all left home now so we are reverting back to our younger years and living life again.
Is 28 young to be having kids? Mine are 19 and 21 now and in college, still happily married,
Was 20 with my first (hes an engineer now). Was making minimal wage back then. Married the mom at 24 separated by 25. Decided it was time to party and blew any savings I had.
Remarried at 35, second and third at 36 and 38.
We’re all good but alot of bumps in the past 29years
Great now my youngest is 24 and I’m divorced from their mom
17-42 were a fucking hard slog but once I freed myself from the financial black hole that is their mother
Paid off my house (twice) got good savings, good job, got promoted twice post divorce
I can retire at 58 in 6 years
I never had a day from leaving school where I stayed in my own place, once I manged to grease my ex wife out of the house, I finally realised how wonderful living alone can be
8 years from the split and my desire to have someone in my life (and house) is still welded at zero
I causally date until they realise I’m not changing my stance for them, have a few female freinds now that give me the few hours of male female socialising a week that tops that battery up
The plan when I had kids so young (baby trap but such is life) was to start enjoying life ince they were adults and self suffient
That would have come at 42 but my ex wife wanted to cash in soon as I’d paid off the mortgage and she could get her half
So it took another 3 years paying her off but the moment I did, my life switched to seriously easy mode
First kid at 21, she 20. Second at 25 she 24. Honestly? I hate to be that guy based on all the other comments but life is good. The kids are 15 and 11 now and her and I have been married for over 8 years living together for 13.
It was hard in the beginning. We lived at home for the 1st 2 years and it almost drove us apart. Now that the kids are older we have so much more time together and doing stuff with the kids is easier too since they’re adolescents. All of the couples that started around the same time we did are now getting divorced and it’s such a sad thing but her and I talk a lot about how we don’t ever want that for us. I don’t have a secret to what’s made it work other than communication and I’ve always prioritized our relationship and she does the same. I guess we got lucky that we found each others person and with having a family baked into it, it’s enabled us to truly appreciate what we have. I hope that never changes but we’ve also openly talked about going to couples counseling if at anytime in the future we can’t talk through our own problems. I hope everyone that wants it gets to find their person.
Not sure what you consider young but my wife and I had our first when I was 24 and she was 21. Then our 2nd when I was 26 and she was 23.
Everything is going so badly now, but for me personally. My wife is experiencing some of the best career success of her life. My daughter and son are so don’t with school this year. With 24? School days left they’re practically frothing at the mouth for summer time.
Having kids early was difficult, but now it’s truly a gift. My kids are so much more active and want to do things and go places and I’m not 40 years old trying to keep up. My parents had kids late. My dad was 40 when I turned 7. My sister just had her first at 37 and she says it’s really difficult.
I didn’t understand at first then I remembered that taking care of an infant is pretty easy when you’re still in your prime.
Wouldn’t change a single second of it.
Wish I knew what red flags in partner looked like…
Its pretty fantastic. I lost access to them during the divorce. The divorce took longer to get through than the marriage lasted. But I got 50/50. Then when they were 13 they wanted to come live with me. That court battle lasted 2 years. They’re 20 now and still living and working with me.
Became a dad at 24 (if that’s early enough?)
Daughter is now at University, I’m still with her mother and we’re now settling into a whole new “part time parenting” thing.
Life is good.
It’s sad to see a lot of posts here ended in divorce. I hope things are much better now for you guys.
Not me, but good friend’s exgf tossed her pill rt before he left for military. Yup. You know. He did ‘honorable’ thing by marrying her. Popped 2nd kid before he turned 21 ircc. He said it was tough. But he essentially had child free house in early 40s
My oldest was born when I was 31, which I don’t know is ‘early’… Suppose if my wife at the time was younger we could have waited longer, but it seemed to be a good time to me. Seems these days a lot of guys think it makes more sense to wait and find a younger women to have a family with… I wouldn’t do that myself.
I’m 50 now, my two sons are my pride & joy: no two ways about it.
Only downside really was second pregnancy / birth had serious complications for my wife and ended up being pretty devastating to her long term health. She survived but the cost was high, and in a way contributed to our (amicable) divorce, which was a bit sad, but life rolls on. I see it this way, and hundred years ago, my wife and child would have died in childbirth, plain and simple, so… I don’t complain.
Either way I know neither of us could imagine life without our sons…
Was 24 when my first came along. Due to the pregnancy I married a bitch I wasn’t in love with. At 25 my second was born, with a girl I was seeing outside of my shitty marriage. At 27 my last was born, with my second wife. My oldest and I were forbidden to see each other until she was fifteen and her mother couldn’t handle her. Then she moved in with me, my wife, and my son. She straightened out and we have a close relationship. My other daughter came to stay with us every summer. We have an occasional phone call and holiday visits relationship. My son is in college and still lives at home. He is my best friend.
Had a kid when I was 19, applied to the oilfields in Texas with a job at Walmart and my child’s mother’s car to my name, worked my ass off until I was 31 (right now) and now I own a home and see her whenever she wants to come over. I split with her mom about 1 year in so I just paid child support that entire time and we get along fine.
Soon to be divorced dad. I thought I had it all and that I was lucky to have had my child early.
What I didn’t know is that people change over time, and while my wife was the loveliest person when I met her, she became someone completely different over time.
Not me but out of all my friends that had kids early, there’s only 1 that’s still with the mother. The rest are paying child support.