Getting a divorce, ex doesn’t agree with me asking for spousal support and financial equalization

My ex-husband accused me of financial infidelity as I had gone into debt with $34 000 back taxes owed.

I run my own business and have done so for the last 10 years. The past two years, my business income fell by $20 000 each year with my 2024 income being $40 000 less than 2 years ago. In previous years, my business income had only ever gone up with the exception of 2020. $10 000 of that $34 000 debt is from business expenses with equipment unexpectedly breaking.

The rest is from me paying equally into our expenses when I was making $30 000 less than him this year and $10 000 less than him the previous year. In fact, he has made more than me throughout our whole marriage and living together previously and I have always still paid equally into our expenses. I told him on a weekly basis for the last two years how stressed out I was about my business and how I was far behind where I was at this time the previous year financially. He stonewalled me. He never offered to revise how we contributed financially nor did he offer any emotional support.

It made me feel I was on my own to figure out how to make more money from my business as I was not getting any help or a response from him. I did not explicitly tell him that I was going into debt because I did not feel he was going to help me given all the stonewalling in spite of me repeatedly bringing it up.

When I finally told him explicitly after realizing after peak season for my business passed that I wasn’t going to be able to make up the shortfall on my own, he ended things.

I have decided to ask for spousal support and financial equalization because I moved 5 times in the 10 years we lived together so he could be close to his work, which meant uprooting my business each time to a new location and still traveling often 1.5-2 hours one way to my original location since that is where most of my clients are based.

I feel like my business growth was hampered in favour of supporting his career development. I also feel it was unfair for me to be contributing 50% to expenses when I was making less than him. I also was doing 95% of the cooking, almost all the dishes, much of the daily cleaning and all the dog walking and care. He keeps dismissing my contributions and sacrifices as if they are nothing. This caused a lot of friction in the relationship as I felt unsupported and unappreciated in every way and if he had done his fair share, I would have been able to pour that energy and time into my business and or looking for another source of income. Now I am on my own trying to get financially sound again while also working on growing my business. I have moved back in with family so I can speed-track this process. But I feel that morally and legally, I have a right to ask for both spousal support and financial equalization given how much I’ve sacrificed for this relationship both personally and career-wise. But he does not agree and has a lot of anger and resentment towards me as a result.