So I (23f) went to a house party after work yesterday evening. I rushed out the door and didn’t eat a robust dinner, grabbed some McDonalds chips on the way and all was well for the first couple hours of the party. . . then they brought out jelly shots and I think this was my downfall. I got a lot more drunk that I expected, and I don’t remember leaving the party, I just remember being very drunk on the train home. I got home safe, and this morning I apologised for getting so drunk but everyone said that it was fine and I was fun to be around and I did double check with multiple people and they swore they were telling the truth. I was with my best friend at the party and I trust her to tell me the truth if I did do anything reall bad.
I just think I’m stressed because I genuinely wasn”t intending to get that drunk and I haven’t been drunk like that for a long time, I just feel quite out of control. Idk I feel like my bestie would say if I did something egregious and I don’t think I would because I’m not a crazy drunk even when I do get drunk. I’m just freaking out a bit because there’s a horrid voice in my head telling me that all my friends hate me and they’ll never forgive me for ‘getting too drunk’. Even though I don’t think my behaviour was anything out of the ordinary. I also talked to my coworker about it today (we’re close), and she said that I’m 23 and everyone gets too drunk at parties once in a while and people don’t care as much as I think.
Can someone older and wiser please tell me I’m being silly?
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Everything’s okay! We all have a little too much fun sometimes. You’re alive, that’s what matters. Don’t regret any of this 😁
You’re totally fine and just having a classic case of “overthinking it”. It’s a party, the expectation is to get drunk (not saying you have to, but nobody’s going to complain), and if your friends are telling you they had a great time with you, take their word for it.
Just have a nice meal before the party next time lol
You’re experiencing “hangxiety.” You have nothing to be anxious about, but the hangover is making you feel that way!
Yeah, this happens when you binge try to wait in the future and you won’t keep feeling this way! Nothing to worry about
Definitely don’t stress. It happens to everyone. You made it home in one piece. Just be sure you eat well before drinking from now on, and focus on recovering from what I’m guessing is a killer hangover.
Lol I’m 22 so I feel this, if you asked your friends and nothing happened it is totally fine. Just pace yourself next time and make sure to get a good meal in/space out your drinks more. If you didn’t harm yourself or others, or get in legal trouble you’re okay. Keep in mind alcohol is a depressant so the next day it is not uncommon to feel anxious and out of whack. It’ll pass!
You clearly know that you’re being silly.
You aren’t being silly ,you are being anxious , upset and hungover.
Take it as a lesson.
But also accept that people told you the truth , and believe them.
Personally ,I never drink so much I can’t remember things afterwards.I learnt my limits.
I don’t drink cocktails , punch etc , because it’s hard to know how much alcohol I’m consuming.
You probably didn’t do anything to embarrass yourself. Or maybe you did? But it’s probably not as big of a deal as it feels. However- I will be in the minority by saying don’t ignore this because it could lead to bigger problems. It’s ok to be concerned about losing control, when you think of it from a safety and health perspective. Drinking to the point of not remembering things does harm your body, generally speaking.
I used to get these hangxiety episodes really bad and it eventually made me realize I actually don’t like drinking. I don’t like myself when I drink in excess. It wasn’t worth it, feeling so awful the next day. I may have a drink during the holidays or special occasions, but I just got so sick of it robbing me of the next day or even a few days. The real fun is showing up and being with your friends. So, if you get to a point where you want to try NOT drinking, ignore any peer pressure and be free to show up as your full, sober self. And stay hydrated. 🙂
That’s post drunk anxiety. Sleep it off it’ll fade
This literally happens to me every time I get extra. I’ve asked follow up questions enough to know if did something wrong they’d tell me. Now I don’t ask. I also don’t have a history of behaving poorly wasted.
It’s called hangxiety. It’s common to have lots of anxiety after a night of drinking too much. It’ll pass! Promise.
In some time, you will think that it was pointless to think about what other tought, just get some rest and you will be fine
Im older but i dont know about wiser 😜 We’ve all been there! If its not in your personality to get out of control I’m sure you’re fine. If my bestie made an ass out of herself I’d 109% tell her. One of my friends when I was just a bit older than you are now was schmammered out of her mind and I literally threw her over my shoulder and hauled her out of there. The 2 men that were trying to separate her from me were pretty mad but she was too far gone to realize what was about to happen to her. She relayed me by barfing in my car. Get you a friend like me lol
Take a break from drinking for a bit. It can really snowball into problematic drinking real quick. Try not to sweat this incident though. Our 20s are for making stupid choices and learning from them. Always, always always be safe. The world is different for women and we have to take additional precautions.
ETA stay away from jelly shots altogether. Those little bastards sneak up on you. I had to learn that the hard way. Worst hangover EVER
If you really did something bad or upset someone, you would’ve found out already.
You’re totally fine and got nothing to worry about
probably nothing to worry about, by the description, but let that inform you going forward. If you don’t feel comfortable with possible blacking out, then try to feel for when you reach your limit before that. be safe.
Drink some pedialyte or gatorade to calm down that hangxiety.
Be careful jf youre partying and taking public transport. Don’t wanna get into a bad situation on a train whilst blackout lol
If this kind of thing is going to bother you this much, set a hard limit on your drinking and stick to it.
Your best said it was all goid, so let it go
It is not as bad as you think;
You were with friends and if you were badly impaired they (hopefully) would not have let you leave on your own.
You were able to get home OK.
You did not try to drive.
You did not wake up in a strange bed with someone you do not know.
One of my favorite quotes is;
>“Good judgment comes from experience, experience comes from bad judgement.”
You’ve got hangover anxiety. Nobody is sitting around thinking about the embarrassing thing you may have done, they’re all sitting around thinking about the embarrassing thing they may have done.
I won’t get that drunk around people I don’t know. But getting hammered and causing no issues sounds okay.
I think most of us have done this at one point or another in our lives. You didn’t do anything terrible or embarrassing so the best way forward is to remember how it felt and be more careful on the future. Something bad could have happened and you know that so next time you will be more careful. You didn’t do anything wrong or bad, this was not a moral failing and you don’t need to feel bad. We learn through experience so just take the lesson for what it was and move on. I promise no one is thinking about this but you.
I thought all Mai Tais were made with Vodka which I can handle. But only the flavored ones’. Oh boy; rum is not for me.
Oh it sounds like you lost time or “blacked out” from too many ounces. You were concerned you may have done something embarrassing and forgot.
The important part is your friends kept you safe.
Try to remember how many shots and drinks you had for next time and then half that! They say when you black out that it doesn’t take as many the next time.
Hydrate!
OP, don’t worry. Most people are too busy with their own anxieties and worries to think about other people.
But you named what the underlying stressor is. It’s not embarrassing yourself, it’s getting drunker than you intended to get and feeling that loss of control. That’s the thing to take a closer look at.
If it’s a case of feeling out your boundaries, take this as useful information. Eat a good meal before you go out, pace yourself, and check in with how your body feels before taking another drink. It’s ok to slow down and take your time.
If it’s something more, maybe take a break from drinking and see how that feels. A little distance can give you perspective on why and how you drink.
Hangziety is real. It will pass. Previous posts are correct.
I had so many of these. You get to the point where you ask a couple people if you showed your ass and trust them when they say you didn’t. Sometimes there will be one or two people who say you were loud or annoying but if you’re gunna party you gotta get over it. Have fun!! Get out of your head 🙂
First, if they’re you’re friends, they’re not going to all tell you the same lie. That would be difficult to orchestrate and if they were looking to distance themselves, they wouldn’t have told you all was fine. I’d be inclined to trust them. Use it as a learning experience and endeavor to not put you or them, in this position again.
Nobody was hurt; property wasn’t damaged; you didn’t fuck someone else’s significant other. You will find, you can bounce back from just about anything else.
Don’t worry. You’re fine. It’s VERY easy to get far more wasted on jello shots than many people think. Chances are you’re dealing with anxiety today since you feel you lost control of your drinking. You didn’t. You merely had something that catches a ton of people unaware.
Your brain chemistry is off because of the alcohol. It’s causing reduction in serotonin and anxiety. Drink water, eat a healthy meal and move your body.
You’ll be fine.
I’m older, anyway, so “It will be okay”!
PS :- Off topic, sort of…I’d advise not sharing stories/problems like this with coworkers, especially on the clock and actively at work. You don’t know who else might overhear you. Also, sad but true I’m learning from Reddit that in this current job scarcity that sometimes you find out too late that someone isn’t trustworthy.
Everyone’s been there, it’s fine. Pay it forward by looking out for them when they have had a few next time. For now have some water and some hydralite and I guarantee you’ll feel better soon!
Your fine. It happens to virtually every adult a time or two. It’s no big deal, I promise.
You thought shit was fucked. Turns out maybe not. Enjoy.