I don’t mean this rudely at all I just think the standards we put them to are very stupid.
Like for example men are often told that if their women says she doesn’t want something when he gets something for himself and he does what she asks and doesn’t get something for her all of a sudden he’s the asshole but if a guy gets mad at a girl for getting herself something and not him suddenly he’s unclear and controlling.
Or even if a man is to call another girl pretty to cheer her up and his girlfriend immediately thinks he’s cheating and everyone is on her side but if a girl were to call a man handsome to cheer him up and her boyfriend gets upset then all of a sudden he’s limiting her and is being controlling.
Or if a girl cheats on her man she’s a baddie and if a guy cheats on his girl he’s shitted on (not saying cheating is ok I’ve been cheated on And it sucks)
Get what I mean? It seems fucked up to me
Comments
You’re living in a fantasy world
I’ve never heard anyone call a girl a baddie for cheating. Most of these seem like stories from “girlfriends do this and boyfriends do this” ragebait videos.
Those are more like stereotypes and toxic people you just personally come in the contact with. I’m not saying they’re 100% wrong like the first example was pretty common for young ladies or immature women who expected their partner to read their mind and could instantly understand what she wanted without communicating. But the rest of them would fall in those categories.
Teenagers and people that are barely adults sometimes behave like that or people that have the same level of maturity but this is definitely nothing universal.
People also like to infantilize women and some women like this role for themselves especially on social media, you just have to look at these weird trends like “girl dinner” and this “I’m just a girl” stuff. An adult not being able to communicate what they want or acting as if they don’t know what they want is childish no matter the gender. Thinking that jealousy is a personality trait is also infantilizing.
There are already unequal standards to begin with so I don’t think this is necessarily something you can directly compare. Some people just act incredibly stupid and the internet encourages that.
You’re describing immature behaviour. Emotionally mature people don’t act like that.
It sounds like the people you’ve interacted with tend to have these double standards but that doesn’t mean it’s universal. There are definitely unfair expectations placed on men, just as there are on women, but they vary by social circles and cultures.
Just an example, in some groups, men might be unfairly judged for simply following requests, while in others, they might not and while some people excuse cheating when a woman does it, in most cases, both men and women who cheat are seen as wrong. These dynamics often are caused by a biased iutlook by the people involved rather than it being a universal “double standard”
No, I haven’t seen this. I assume you’re a teenager and are noticing immature behaviour, instead of social norms amongst adults.
Yeah.
You’re not going to find a very receptive audience on Reddit though.
Yes you are right. In the modern age there are a ton of double standards for men. However I view these double standards as a blessing. It allows us men to find MGTOW and free ourselves from servitude to women.
Yes. While misogyny and patriarchy are a thing and in many material ways women get the bad end of the stick, men also suffer within this system, and frequently at the hands of women. I (40,M) am bisexual and the only instances of homophobia I’ve ever encountered directly have been at the hands of women. While any view I have on misogynistic behaviour must be qualified by the fact that I’m not the victim of it, I see women behaving openly misogynistically more often than I see men doing it.
I am of course a feminist, but it seems trivial to notice that much anti-feminist behaviour is by women. Toxic femininity – while much smaller of a problem than toxic masculinity – exists, and is inherently more subtle.
I recommend Enemy Feminisms for a more thorough understanding of the various ideologies underpinning this sort of behaviour.
This can also lead to men not being believed when they say they are being gaslit and controlled by their female partners, with people starting off from the assumption that it must be the other way round, but to see women as victims and men as perpetrators in all situations by default is inherently unfeminist.
There seems to be a lot of people in this world that think a relationship doesn’t require talking to each other and making compromises. People who are trying to be in relationships and care more about what other people think instead of wanting to make their partner happy are going to die alone. The only relationships that last are ones where both people actively think about how their partner feels. If something your partner does bothers you, you talk about it. If they are worth being with you will be able to come to a compromise.