I (25M) have been in relationship with my girlfriend (27F) for three years now. We started dating after we met in a new country both study masters in. We were good friends for half a year before we started dating and it felt like it all moved too fast. This is my first relationship but not hers but we moved in together with another friend 4 months into the relationship.
But since then I have been going through a terrible time. Failing multiple exams, getting exmatriculated from the university etc. She was with me through all of it but sometimes she was complaining about me ignoring her or not doing enough things together. I finally got it all together a year ago, started fresh in a new university, passed all my subjects and thesis. So we are in long distance right now. I’m going through a difficult time again where I’m working in a restaurant part time and applying for internships but not finding one. She expects us to meet once in 15 days by either her coming her or me going there. But the problem is I feel like I cannot get anything done when she is here. I try to focus on applying when I’m not working, but I can’t do that with focus since she would want to go on a walk or hike or swimming when we meet.
I just feel like she doesn’t understand my struggle but keeps complaining that I don’t prioritise her. She gets everything easily without much effort, passes exam studying little, got an internship quickly after her subjects and now writing her thesis at the same company. So she is in a bit more stable stage than me and although I keep telling her that we can do things together when I’m also in the same stage she doesn’t seem to understand.
We had a major fight couple of days ago. She had a week off from her work which she had told me about a month ago (her only week off for next 6 months before she started her thesis according to her but she gets to wfh and take the weekends off). She wanted us to spend some time together during that time but my supervisor assigned me some shifts end of last week. So I told her I cannot come there. She told me she will come here but I made it clear that we cannot do things together this week since I’ll be tired after work and need to do applications but again she went on a rant about me not prioritising her and me spending time with friends or on my hobbies.
I feel like we have just drifted apart. On top of that she’s a Brahmin and her parents want her to get married within a couple of years. I feel there will be a major clash with families later on. I am still young and although I love her I’m not really sure if all these efforts are worth it in the end. I asked her for a break after that fight and now I’m thinking if it’s time to end it completely.
TL;DR
Long-distance 3-year relationship, I’m struggling with career while she’s stable and wants more time together, but I feel drained and unsure if love is enough to keep going.