let me preface by saying I have a lot of body image issues, I am in therapy, and he knew all of this. I was speaking with a man since march or april, talking every day, most of the day. we would call for hours sometimes until 2am talking about everything (dreams, goals, even a possible future). due to multiple circumstances we ended up meeting a couple of weeks ago in person for the first time, had a really nice first date where he brought flowers and we had drinks and went on a walk. second date we saw a movie, and were intimate in his car afterwards. on the third date I went to his place (lingerie etc), we were together for like 5hrs being intimate/cuddling/talking. he would constantly pull me closer, hold me and brush my hair (basically all the right things). sometimes he would just stare at me, tell me I am beautiful or perfect. he also finished like 4 or 5 times in this period. two days later he sent me a message (title) saying he wasn’t ready for anything. I can’t get it out of my head that this is just an easy way to let me down, and really it was because of my body. I look fine with clothes on, but I have a lot of stretchmarks and my chest isn’t as perky as I would be comfortable with, certain angles my stomach looks weird. he seemed to be fine the first two dates, then suddenly saw me naked and this happened. I am spiraling.
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His sudden shift likely isn’t about your body, intimacy can trigger past fears. Believe his actions (adoring you naked) over your insecurities.
If he’s genuine, he’ll return when ready. If not, his loss you’re worthy of consistent love. Not in bits and pieces.
You thinking it’s because of your body is just your insecurity talking. There’s a couple possibilities.
He was just in it for the sex and now that he got it he’s on to try to find the next woman. Obviously a terrible thing to do but has nothing to do with your attractiveness.
He’s telling the truth. Sounds like it was a very intimate night. It might have been too intense for him.
I wouldn’t be able to “perform” 4 or 5 times in one night if I didn’t find the woman attractive.
There’s no reason to conclude your body had anything to do with it. Don’t be your own harshest critic.