So me and my so have been together for 4 months, I am a very loving and giving person and I feel it has been taken advantage of. I literally do everything for this woman. I pay for everything. I pay for her food, hair, nails .etc. Its gotten to a point to where there is no more appreciation. I dont even get a thank you when money is sent it is basically expected. I am not a wealthy person, she knows this and takes full advantage of my niceness. I dont know what to do, i really love this girl but she doesn’t show any appreciation or respect for what i do. The problem im facing is we get along so great, never have gotten along with someone likes this and really dont want to end up. How do i go about this and how can i get it in her head to click. I have told her multiple times i dont feel respected or appreciated and it goes unnoticed. Please help me figure out what the best plan is here. No sugar coating please
TL;DR how should i handle not being my SO not being appreciative over the things i do.
Comments
Stop paying for everything. See if she sticks around. If she’s just using you for your money, either she will leave, or she’ll get a lot better at at least faking gratitude.
You’re not a wealthy person and yet in a 4-mo relationship you’ve been paying for everything since the beginning? You’ve trained her to expect this from you, and now you’re resentful about it. How did she react when you said you don’t feel respected or appreciated?
It sounds like she’s taking advantage, but it also sounds like you normalized this behaviour and expectation between you.
You’re voluntarily paying for everything, and you want something in return… so maybe just… stop doing that? Did she ask? Or you just started “giving” from the beginning? Either way if you don’t wanna do it… don’t.
You could also have a conversation with her about your feelings, and let her know. That’s would be a great place to start.