There is a popular cultural myth that twins are born best friends who share a secret language and an unbreakable bond. We see it in movies and read about it in books, but reality is often a lot messier and crueler. Sometimes twins are just two people who shared a womb but have absolutely nothing else in common, especially when high school popularity contests get involved. One bride on Reddit just shattered the “twin mystique” by refusing to let her sister be in her wedding party, and the backstory is a masterclass in how trauma lingers long after graduation.
Our narrator is a 25-year-old woman who is getting married next fall. She has a fraternal twin sister, which should theoretically mean she has a built-in Maid of Honor. But their relationship took a nosedive the second they hit high school. While the sister blossomed into an outgoing, bubbly cheerleader, the narrator was the shy, nerdy bookworm. And instead of protecting her sister, the popular twin threw her to the wolves.
The OP explains that her sister didn’t actively pick on her, but she did something almost worse. She stood by with her head down and did nothing when others bullied her twin. At home, everything was fine, but the second they stepped onto school grounds or went to the mall, the popular twin treated her sister like a social disease. She refused to be seen with her. It is the kind of silent betrayal that cuts deeper than any insult ever could.
The defining moment of this toxic dynamic happened on their sixteenth birthday. The popular twin wanted a huge party, but the OP had no friends and didn’t want to go. Their parents insisted on a joint celebration because that is what you do with twins. So, what did the sister do? She didn’t encourage her twin. She didn’t introduce her to people. She quietly offered her sister 100 dollars to pretend she was sick so she wouldn’t have to be embarrassed by her presence. The OP took the money to avoid the humiliation, but the emotional scar was permanent.
Fast forward to the present. The OP went to college across the country, joined a sorority, found her own tribe, and healed through years of therapy. Now she is getting married and has chosen her sorority “big” as her Maid of Honor and her friends as bridesmaids. Her parents, desperate for a picture-perfect family moment, suggested a “compromise” where the twin is just a regular bridesmaid. The OP said absolutely not.
She graciously agreed to let her sister attend as a guest, which is more than she deserves frankly. But when the family pushed back, asking why she wouldn’t include her own twin, the OP delivered a line of dialogue so perfect and so cutting that I need to sit down. She looked at them and asked, “But what would other people think if she was seen with me?”
It was a direct callback to the years her sister spent hiding her away to protect her own reputation. The sister immediately started crying. She claimed it was all in the past and she was just “young and immature,” but she never actually apologized for the years of exclusion and the bribe that ruined their sixteenth birthday.
The parents think the bride is being harsh, but let’s be real here. You cannot treat your sibling like a shameful secret for four formative years and then expect to stand next to them in the spotlight when they finally find happiness. The sister made it clear she didn’t want to be associated with the OP when it wasn’t cool. Now that the OP is the center of attention, the sister wants back in. That is not how relationships work.
So is she the ahole? Absolutely not. N-T-A. The sister showed her true colors when she paid 100 dollars to erase her twin from a birthday party. She bought her way out of the relationship back then, and she can’t buy her way back in now just because there is a photographer present. The bride owes her nothing but a seat in the back row, far away from the altar.