Dating in your twenties is basically an extended series of awkward financial standoffs. You are always trying to figure out who pays for the appetizers, how to split the drinks, and exactly what the protocol is when a birthday is involved. But one guy on Reddit recently discovered that the true test of a new relationship is not who picks up the check. It is how your date reacts when you show a little bit of kindness to a service worker.
The Original Poster is a twenty seven year old guy who had been casually seeing a twenty five year old woman. They were gearing up for their third official date, which just so happened to fall right on his birthday. Third dates are usually the make or break moment for a new couple. You are finally past the initial small talk and starting to see each other’s actual personalities.
The date picked the venue, and she went with a really fun, retro gourmet burger and fries joint. The Original Poster described it as a total Pulp Fiction style restaurant with a car sticking out of the wall. He was completely on board, noting that corny restaurants are always a blast for a birthday celebration. Everything was going perfectly fine until the waitress came over to check on their table.
While the waitress was doing her standard check in, the Original Poster casually mentioned that they were celebrating his birthday. In a super cute twist of fate, the waitress revealed that it was actually her birthday too. They all had a good laugh about the fun coincidence, and the waitress and the birthday boy even started calling each other by those exact nicknames for the rest of the meal.
Eventually, the fun banter ended and the dreaded check arrived. Now, standard dating etiquette usually dictates that if you take someone out for their birthday, you treat them to the meal. But to his complete surprise, the date made absolutely zero move to pay. She just sat there. Being a total gentleman, he did not raise a stink about it. He just pulled out his wallet and paid for his own birthday dinner without making it a big deal.
When he looked closely at the receipt, he noticed the waitress had written a sweet little “Happy Birthday!” note with a smiley face at the bottom. He paid the bill with a standard tip, and they both got up to put on their coats. But at the very last second, he told his date to hold on. He opened the bill folder back up, slipped a crisp hundred dollar bill inside, and wrote “You too!” next to the waitress’s sweet message.
His date immediately gave him a sideways look, and the entire vibe of the evening completely plummeted. The second they got into his car, she deployed the ultimate weapon of toxic dating. She hit him with a brutal, suffocating silent treatment. She just sat there sighing heavily and staring dramatically out the passenger window like she was starring in a tragic indie film.
When he finally asked her what was wrong, she blurted out that he was totally wasting his money. She called him irresponsible and claimed he should have spent that cash elsewhere or given it to a deserving charity. He calmly reiterated that it was not a big deal to bless someone with a good tip, but she refused to give him a straight answer and stayed completely silent for the rest of the painfully awkward drive home.
She got out of the car without saying a single word and walked straight inside without looking back. But the absolute peak of audacity arrived the very next day via text message. She finally dropped the fake charity excuse and revealed the real reason she was so mad. She texted him to ask how he felt about giving a waitress a hundred dollars when he had not bought his date a single gift yet.
Let us just pause and absorb that level of entitlement. They have been on exactly three dates. It was literally his birthday. She picked the restaurant, made him pay for his own birthday meal, and then got fiercely jealous that he gave a birthday gift to the waitress instead of her. She somehow managed to make a stranger’s birthday tip completely about herself.
The internet was absolutely ruthless in the comment section. Everyone universally agreed that he is definitely not the a**hole and that he just experienced the ultimate blessing in disguise. Finding out someone is greedy, entitled, and jealous of service workers on the third date saves you months of misery down the line. You do not demand presents on someone else’s birthday.
How a person treats restaurant staff is the greatest personality test on the planet. This guy passed with flying colors by being incredibly generous on his special day, and his date failed spectacularly by throwing a selfish tantrum. He needs to leave her on read forever, go back to that burger joint, and maybe see if the cool waitress wants to grab a drink.