How can I change my 39m long distance relationship with my wife 36f?

My wife 36F and I 39M have been in a married for 7 years, we have been together for 12 years total. I work in construction and traveled for work for a large portion of our relationship. During this time my wife got a job working nights that she loves. We always talk on the phone multiple times a day to check in with each other and how we are doing. I would drive 8-10 hours round trip each weekend to be able to spend time with her. 3 years ago, I was promoted into the office and no longer have to travel as we bought a house within commuting distance.

We have both been so focused on building a life that we want, we worked ourselves into opposite schedules. We are still able to talk on the phone, but we both live in the same house and we never see each other. My wife takes care of bringing the kids to school and scheduling the doctor’s appointments. I handle everything from picking them up from school, laundry, dinners, and everything that happens in the afternoon.

I work from 6am-3pm and she works 3pm-12am. She has tried to get day shifts but the has not gotten any movement in her company in the last 2 years.

I feel like we are in different worlds, and my wife is so tired that most weekends she sleeps till 1pm while I’ve been organizing the house from 6am. I brought this up to her and we have made plans to help with this. We have scheduled date nights twice a week and start marriage counseling next month. I fell selfish for asking her to put in more work but I am not happy with how things are right now. I would really appreciate any advise on how to work with her, I’m afraid that she will work really hard at first and then things will go back to us living in two different worlds. Does anyone have any advice on how to prevent us from going back to the same routine and have this plan work?

TLDR: my wife and I work completely different schedules and are no longer connecting