Hi all –
My dad had a stroke last year. He has since been living with my husband (29) and myself (28, f). His designated bathroom is also the guest bathroom. Over the last few months, we have noticed and have had to clean urine at the base of the toilet. We started the conversation with asking him to use the restroom sitting down. He agreed to it. We have since seen the seat left up and followed up on the original conversation. He denies standing while using the restroom. My husband has asked me to talk to my dad again, but I don’t know how to approach this situation. We clean it when we notice anything, but there is still somewhat of a smell in the house because of it. What would you recommend?
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Is he starting to get dementia?
“Dad, this is really embarrassing to bring up again, but we’re still having to clean up pee that’s hit the floor. Would it help if we got a handrail or something so you can sit and stand more easily? How can we fix this?”
I’m assuming your dad still understands, though after a stroke, it’s possible he doesn’t. He also might just be having some weakness that makes it difficult to sit/stand, thus my mention of a handrail (or some other accessibility tool).
Approach with compassion and concern instead of blame, and he’s less likely to become defensive.