i am posting this because my boyfriend (25m) is lonely. we are a medium distance couple, about 45 min drive each way, he works in the small city i live in, but lives in a wayyyy smaller community like a village dang near.
male loneliness epidemic… we see each other a few times a week sometimes less- i work pretty much opposite shifts to him. but i do genuinely understand spending time with your girlfriend is different than hanging with your guy friends. every weekend is the same thing, wishing he had at least one person to do things with him. (since i work a lot of weekends and once again, girlfriend shit different than man shit i understand)
so please, can anyone give me any advice to share with him on how he can make friends? or how anyone else has dealt with this? how to cope? how you’re coping? how you met some friends in your male adult life?
i personally find it easy, i work in the restaurant biz so i don’t really need to socialize (i get that at work) and i mainly just make girl friends with my coworkers and thats fulfilling… i don’t know how i could turn my life experience into real advice to help him. i just want to help.
here’s some extra info:
– he runs his own business with one employee, works typical office hours
– he does have some friends, but they don’t drive and work away so they aren’t around and when they are they’re kind of into partying which BF has grown out of.
– and when i say small town i mean rural Saskatchewan canada, seriously slim pickings
– he doesn’t game
– he’s not really into sports
– he is kind of a homebody… makes it more difficult i think
– and like previously mentioned doesn’t drink or party, not into sports bars and stuff
some edits and more info
– he is into vintage stuff, vintage oilfield stuff, posters, car parts and tin cans and such
– he is into old cars and trucks and also new vehicular things
– he does know how to golf (but it’s time consuming and expensive, big drinking culture)
– he is extremely work focused, hard working.
– he likes music a lot
– not much time for reading
– ouid friendly
Comments
Here’s an original copy of /u/shitneypooart’s post (if available):
i am posting this because my boyfriend (25m) is lonely. we are a medium distance couple, about 45 min drive each way, he works in the small city i live in, but lives in a wayyyy smaller community like a village dang near.
male loneliness epidemic… we see each other a few times a week sometimes less- i work pretty much opposite shifts to him. but i do genuinely understand spending time with your girlfriend is different than hanging with your guy friends. every weekend is the same thing, wishing he had at least one person to do things with him. (since i work a lot of weekends and once again, girlfriend shit different than man shit i understand)
so please, can anyone give me any advice to share with him on how he can make friends? or how anyone else has dealt with this? how to cope? how you’re coping? how you met some friends in your male adult life?
i personally find it easy, i work in the restaurant biz so i don’t really need to socialize (i get that at work) and i mainly just make girl friends with my coworkers and thats fulfilling… i don’t know how i could turn my life experience into real advice to help him. i just want to help.
here’s some extra info:
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Start a small book club, where you can meet once or twice a week, online if needed. Talk over coffee etc about the book.
Hobbies.
Find something he likes, find a group. Engage.
Try looking at events on Facebook , sometimes they’ll have fairs , shows , car shows , pretty much anything
Move.
Maybe he needs to accept some loneliness. Also, solitude is not loneliness. Is this all your opinions or is how big is this problem, really? Don’t feel guilty that you can’t spend more time with him. It is what it is.