How did you realise you sabotaged a good relationship? Does it still bother you?
How did you realise you sabotaged a good relationship? Does it still bother you?
r/AskMen
How did you realise you sabotaged a good relationship? Does it still bother you?
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Well, I realized it when she told me. And years later when I had benefit of hindsight and experience.
Yes, having torpedoed a good relationship still bothers me.
I’ve realized the relationships I feel I “Sabotaged,” were, in fact, not good relationships. But it DOES still bother me from time to time. I’ve been having a bit of trouble lately reflecting upon last summer when I was in a very big feeling’d situationship that I ultimately had to end because of my own mental insecurity. And it turned out to be toxic, but I didn’t see it at the time.
But God was it hot. And I miss the best moments something fierce. But there’s always onwards and forwards, and there’s healing to be done, and there’s more to find out there.
That was a good relationship? I’ll get a dog next time it’s okay.
Oh I knew at the time. I was an 18yo twat who didn’t take her seriously and was quite deservedly dumped as a result. I hope she’s had a great life and found someone who deserved her.
Sometimes u realise it in the process and not after the fact. One way u can discover that is by tapping i to and exploring the fears that surround ur feelings towards the relationship. Ur fears cab reveal a lot about how you manage and potentially sabotage it. Sometimes when fear is confronted sabotage can be caught in time and subverted.
No, I’ve moved on. To all those struggling, just remember it ended for a reason, even if youre the one to blame, its just preparing you for that next special woman so that you dont make the same mistakes again
Yeah, a few times. Unprocessed childhood abandonment trauma, self esteem issues, dealing with emotion. I realised a decade later when I started working on myself and going to therapy. As I look back, I realised that I may be looking at it through rose tinted glasses, but she was a good one. I was going to reach out a few weeks ago, but she’s with someone, and that’s not really fair on her, or me. I hope she’s happy. I’m the best I’ve been in a while. Still hard to not kick yourself.
I ended the one. The one. I was in a terrible place mentally and couldn’t see anything for what it was.
I feel it’s nigh on impossible for me to find that ever again. Sad for sure.
Only realised years later that she was the only one I ever felt actually saw me, and knew who I was. That’s a feeling you don’t forget.