I have felt so lost lately in what I want to do with my life. I’m 23, have secured a degree, have gotten some certs for some random skills (Barista, Lifeguard etc). Worked a handful of random jobs growing up and then went in the office for 2 years from my degree and just felt so cooped up and hated it. Did some travelling for a while and now I am just so lost on where I start with a career, genuinely just feel lost and stuck, how did things work out for you guys during your 20’s? how did you discover your career/ are you happy with it?
How did your 20’s go for you?
r/AskMen
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Corporate finance here. Not happy to say the least.
got lucky. i married my college gf at 22 and we have 4 kids and have spend 25 years together.
A career isn’t something you’re locked into, the only real option is to work different jobs until you figure out what you like, what you can’t stand, and what you just have to accept.
Although I got a top degree at university, it was mostly miserable and repetitive due to mental health issues.
I set up for my next half, got a b.s. started working, bought a house. Saved a lot of money. Traveled and I’m still Traveling every year with my partner. I turned 30 a few months ago.
Its good you have some certs. Dont worry so much about what you want to do, honestly. A lot of times when you get there you realize it’s not really something you wanna do long term anyway. Find what’s in demand and pays well and comes with a manageable work life balance, and has jobs that give good benefits. Don’t live to work my man.
Get into whatever it is you find and you think you can do decently, and then stack money (if possible, managing spending and income is a huge skill and financial literacy will make or break you at times) and do what you want to do in your free time. Make enough to enjoy life.
When people ask me about my dream job. I tell them I don’t dream of labor
i’m 25, work in construction, done it all my like.
i’m open/hopeful that one day i’ll make a career change and have a different opinion – but the last 3 years brought me to the conclusion that “you’ve got to work a job you love” is a load of bs, and that as long as you can tolerate the work and it lets you afford the things you want to do, then it’s good enough.
find happiness in your spare time doing activities you want, and i find it makes up for the shit 5/6 days of work.
I’m 29. I work in a huge soda industry. It pays decent and it’s horrible. Whoever says we are made for physical work and its better than office is fucking delusional. Wasted my life and future. Good luck to everyone, I am happy to whoever makes it big
Quietly. Worked a boring job, didn’t really date anyone, just kind of floated through it spending time with friends and not really doing anything of interest.
My 20s were solid. Started working at a factory at 19, worked my way up through the ranks. Started working towards a degree in Mechatronics & Industrial Automation.
The job didn’t work out, I got laid off at 29. But I finish my degree next month, and it’s fortunately very applicable and relevant in this kind of industry. I did sort of fall into my degree/career path, but sometimes that’s how it goes.
A roller coaster. Got my HS sweetheart pregnant so I married her and joined the service. Went through a nasty divorce and I relocated to a state I’ve never lived in to be near my kids.
Then I met the love of my life here and lived happily ever after.
Side note: it just now occurred to me I got married twice in my 20’s. Didn’t realize it was such a short time frame relatively speaking.
I’m 25. Working in commercial banking. It’s a good career for many. Decent pay. Decent WLB. Been doing it for 3 yrs post grad. I don’t love it. It’s repetitive, mundane at times. I feel like I have no purpose and I’m just a “number” at my very large company. Not very happy recently. And I feel like a lot of stems from my job.
If I were to go back, I wouldn’t have put so much emphasis on money. Find an industry that truly excites you. Something that you see growth in the next 20 years. Renewable/sustainable energy, for example, will have lots of growth. And to me, it sounds interesting and you are doing something good for the environment.
I’m 29.
1 more year to go.
But overall, it has been absolute garbage.
Did nothing but play video games, work, save money, study, with the odd hangout or trip here and there.
Nothing of value to be salvaged or redeemed.
Entering my 30s not sure what to do and
questioning everything as well as being obese.
Didn’t do any drugs or drinking I guess…so yay me….
=(
Edit : Am accountant…
My 20s were rock and roll, fresh out of mandatory military service, was penniless, backpacking all of my country, backpacking half of Europe and found love 5kms from where I grew up, we are still together after 26 years.
I never got a degree, she got a doctorate, turns out she’s good at studying and I’m good at making her happy, we have 2 kids own our house+2 cars all fully payed.
Almost 50 now, and am getting my agronomics engineering degree for fun.
Turn 27 in a few weeks. I’m only just now making enough money to comfortably do all the shit I should’ve been doing in my early 20’s. Wasted years and years working bullshit jobs or inside my apartment with the blackout curtains drawn melting my eyes with the Internet
Life’s a marathon not a sprint mate. Keep moving forward.
It was fine. I worked right out of college, saved money, lived by myself for a year, bought a house, kept saving.
Ideally your degree should be based around what you studied. What are you stuck on? Find a job in the industry and start working.
I went to a vocational school and learned a trade, then after HS sorta went into that trade for a few years before getting into industrial maintenance. I don’t mind the work, can’t say I love it either.
I bought my house when I was 23, my life to that point was saving for a down payment, then I actually bought the house. Then my life was working on the house, picking up every side job I could to make money, got into a bunch of different hobbies just to past the time, many included more work like running a hobby farm with cattle and chickens.
I started my 401k in my 20s and did some planning for retirement.
Now I’m 34, my feet and knees hurt daily with a sprinkle of lower back pain now and then. BUT I only have 4 more years and my house will be paid off then I’ll update the house and maybe do some traveling.
So my 20s included a crap load of work. There was days I was only getting 3-4 hours of sleep per night because I spent so much time working. Around 26 I had to back down a bit with the side jobs because it was affecting my main job.
When I hit 30 I stopped actively looking for more work, now I just work on friends and family’s stuff outside of my main job. I value my time more, I don’t charge more hourly but money doesn’t tempt me to sell my time, I rather enjoy it with my own hobbies.
I didn’t really chose my “career”, I just did things that are semi interesting and kept doing that, playing it safe, strategizing life etc. I have only had 4 W2 jobs my entire life and I have been employed since I was 17. I’m playing the long game, always have been.
My theory is overall I hate having to go to work as in I’m forced to, I have a choice between going to work and the bank taking my house. I don’t mind working.
I don’t want to be 65 still doing this crap, so my plans involved, how can I be done the soonest. That involved buying a house earlier than most of my friends, then figuring out how to pay the SOB off. I had some debates with relatives who “suggested” that I take a 30 year mortgage and invest the difference, I ran the numbers and it didn’t really make enough sense to me and I said no I’m not doing that, I’m gonna pay it off as soon as I can because when it’s paid off nobody can take it from me, I’ll see to it.
Remember it’s not always about what you make, it’s about keeping as much as you can of what you make. Most I made on paper in a year was 52k, which is peanuts in today’s job market and I don’t care because I’ll still finish before all my friends and family who make more money.
I buy old and used vehicles and equipment, if a deal pops up and it’s something I need or can use I’ll buy it, I’ll use it for X amount of time then when I’m done with it, I’ll sell it and I get annoyed if after, I didn’t make money on it. That goes for trucks (not daily drivers) tractors, guns, ATVs, etc. people lose a massive chunk of what they bring home on too new of stuff. Next is subscriptions like TV and internet. I have internet now but I went 8 years only using my phones hotspot for any internet at home. In the winter the thermostat is on 58-62 degrees, I just dress warmer and in summer is 78-80 degrees. Saves a lot on utilities. A little discomfort now, makes a lot of comfort later possible.
I always prided myself on not missing out, as in still being able to do everything everyone else can do but I spend the least to do it. As in I don’t miss out by being cheap, I just go about it differently and don’t have as nice of crap. Well some things I do if it makes financial sense.
Not as expected.
Well, 26 right now and it’s been horrible tbh. Worst depression of my life, horrible relationships and honestly I’ve given up on the idea of having a family or relationship at this point. I genuinely used to be social and liked people. I just don’t enjoy people in general anymore after all the crap I’ve taken, everyone annoys me.
On the plus-side I got my degree and certs and am making progress in my career so yeah I’ve got a good retirement fund to look forward to
First half. 4/10. Second half 8/10
35M. Much, much better than my 30s outside of my dad passing away when I was 24
Came here to help u, instead u got me asking the same question to myself. Well i think its beneficial that u have some skills other than your degree. I dont know what advice i can give u cause im also in my 20s but im sure u will figure it out soon. Try find a a new skill to work with, socialise with people that have a stable life and u are inspired by them. Baby steps and confidence:3
Partied a lot in the first half, got my life together and started dating an amazing woman in the middle. Got my degree, a good career, bought a house, and then got married when at 29. Sprinkle in some mental health issues, experimental drug use, and a couple close run-ins with police early on.
TL;DR: Eventful and worked out pretty well
My twenties were spent in a drunken stupor or an opiate induced stupor. Basically my twenties are a blur. I finally got sober in my 30s got certified to teach, and started my dream career. I absolutely love teaching, but it’s not something I would have chosen in my early 20s. I had to grow as a person before it became possible.
Not well. Lost most of it to depression and self pity
29, started lifting back in college but been focusing more on diet overall and happy for the most part with body. Job wise is where it’s lacking, though not the worst. Wish I had more of “drive” and wish I was better at school/learning so I could be making more but it’s sustainable and I’m sure I’ll make more in the future
My 20s ended beginning of this year. Career wise, I went the “standard” route: studied engineering in school, transitioned into software development after graduating, and steadily built up my career ever since. Went through a couple of long periods where I was out of work due to quitting my first job (started hating it after 3 years) and mass layoffs at my second job, so I did some soul searching and travelled during that time as well. Ultimately, and with a bit of luck, I was able bounce back and find new opportunities each time.
Building your career is important during your 20s, especially if you eventually want to build a steady stream of income to do what you want. I was fortunate enough to pick and stick to a career path that I was interested enough in, and makes good money, but that doesn’t happen for everyone. When I was 23, I had only started my career as an intern, and so much has happened since then, both in and out of work. You mentioned working a bunch of random jobs: those are all experiences that helped shape who you are now, take pride in them. The office job is not glamourous, sitting at a desk staring at a computer all day is definitely not interesting all the time, but sometimes you have to convince yourself to duke it out for the money, and that things will get better eventually.
While career is important and can provide you with a sense of fulfillment, it is also a means to an end, which is to accrue the financial capital you need to enjoy the other parts of your life, which are just as important. These could be your hobbies, dating, spending time with friends and family, traveling – overall, just doing the things you really want to do, right now. Because when we retire someday (hopefully) and don’t need to worry about career anymore, we’re going to need other things in life to keep us entertained, and hopefully we would’ve done other things by that point rather than solely focus on career.
It’s great that you are thinking about these things now, and it’s alright to be lost – from personal experience, this won’t be the first or last time that this happens. For me, I am very happy that I spent time building relationships with people during my 20s: meeting new people at events, reconnecting with old friends, and learning to treasure the ones that matter and keep them close. I’ve been through three long-term relationships in my 20s, learning more about myself with each one. Don’t be afraid to step out of your comfort zone to try new things and live a little; it all adds up in the end. Sometimes, having a fulfilling life outside your career will help you figure out what you want to do for your career as well. You might meet people in your boat who’ll push you, or people who are in positions you aspire to be in who’ll inspire you. You may find opportunities you never realized existed before. You’re at the prime age to explore and figure out the life you want ahead of you, but, to also just enjoy life, period.
At this point, I can’t say that I’ve figured everything out, but I do have a better idea of where I am and the person I want to be. My 20s, if anything, helped me develop that awareness. But I sure had a blast during that time, and I’m happy that I left it all on the table.
I made the mistake of getting married at 19 or 20 to the first woman to take me seriously. I was pretty insecure.
I would have done better to stay single, date and play the field a bit because by the time I was 28 I found myself divorced, traumatized and lost.
27, not really well. Went into an apprenticeship for IT and was completely burnt out over those 3 years. Lots of 16 hour days.. Been working somewhere else now for close to 4 years. I like the work but not the circumstances. Understaffing is a real issue when sales comes up with completely unrealistic SLAs kissing the customers’ asses at every corner and leaves the rest of us to clean up.
I guess I’ve done way too much work and not nearly enough living in the past 7 years. Lost essentially all of my friends and came out the other side with… more time for work I suppose. Some days I think going on bender and disappearing for a couple of months would be a better idea than to keep treading water. I’m tired boss
Best years of my life. Lived a wild, freewheeling existence as a highly paid and profoundly irresponsible ad agency copywriter.
I was also just beginning to sink into the hellish depths of addiction with consequences that would completely destroy my thirties, but fucking YOLO.
I joined the Army at 20 so I would have some time to focus on career choices.
Yep trying different jobs until I found one I like. Took me til 27. Best advice keep doing different stuff you really don’t know what you like and good at until you try it, it’s no time table on that. But something I wish I knew, don’t waste your time if you know you don’t like it and it’s not you. Worst thing to do is waste time cause you won’t get it back.
26yo engineer here. Honestly the only happy part of my career is the pay lol. Then I can use the money to things I actually enjoy
Ages 16-24 were rough for me. Severe depression and loneliness.
Then at 24 I met my (now) wife and my life changed for the better in every conceivable way. COVID happened and I got made redundant for the second time, which was awful, but it ended up being for the best since I was able to get out of a shitty career and retrain into a much better one.
Actually, good.
Traveled and turned 20 down under. Spent time with a nice girl.
Came home, met another nice girl and moved in together. She left overseas for work. Broke my heart.
Sowed my oats. Got some life experience.
Worked a fun job.
Started school.
Met a cool woman at said job.
Married said girl.
Had two wonderful daughters before I turned 30.
So, yeah, pretty good.
Career path is an all-over-the-place line. Ups. Downs. Each job highlighted something I liked and didn’t. Subsequent jobs, I aimed for less of the don’t like things.
I worked overnights for much of my 20’s. Sad to say there are gaps in my memory from chronic sleep deprivation.
I’m 24, I can’t tell you. I’m an engineer, plus part time musician. I can’t tell if I’m being successful or if I’m just doing normal, or if I’m doing bad.
I hate my job, but I love my music, so that’s good