Me 18F and my boyfriend 17M have been together for the past 2.5 years. We have had such an amazing relationship and i’ve always prided myself in having a boyfriend that is such an understanding, supportive, and intelligent person. This past month has honestly been so difficult for me, i’ve been going off my antidepressants for the first time in years, and I haven’t seen my boyfriend in about 3 weeks. I have been wallowing in depression and honestly neglecting him and I feel so incredibly horrible for how i’ve made him feel.
A week ago he asked me for some space, so we didn’t talk for a few days, and he came back after saying he loved me and he’s sorry and he wasn’t trying to do anything horrible. Last night I could tell he wasn’t being honest and I asked him, are you going to break up with me, and he basically told me that it “wasn’t working for him and i deserve someone who can give me their all and he thinks it’s unfair to me to continue.” This was horrible to hear especially knowing we haven’t even seen each other this past month. I called him and I tried to hear him out and explain that my issue is that I had no idea this was going on, and I felt like I have been given no chance to try and work on things with him. He keeps insisting that he sees a future with me and loves me but he can’t forget this month and that’s why he’s so scared.
We’ve always been the type to work on everything together, and just ending so abruptly feels horrible. A lot of our difficulties have arisen from us barely being able to see each other (lately once every few weeks) but in the fall we both move in to the same uni res, and it feels so hard to give up the life we’ve been dreaming of without giving our relationship a chance while we can both be physically present.
I love and care for him so much and I know he does everything with my best intentions in minds but I need help finding a path through this. I will tell him that he can have all the space he needs but I struggle to grasp the idea that he loves me, imagines himself with me, but just wants to give up on us. I’m worried about him and he’s so unlike himself right now. Any advice would be appreciated, what steps should I take from here? I don’t want to know who’s right or who’s wrong I just want to know what the best course of action I can take to help him and myself is.
TL;DR My boyfriend says he loves and wants to be with me but isn’t sure if we are healthy anymore. How can I convince him to give us a chance to work on our relationship together?