Background: tldr at the end
My parents made me do therapy from ages 14-16. My therapist would call them after my sessions and tell them everything I said, whether it was about them, school, my anxieties, etc. I didn’t know this until I was 16, at which point I refused to go to therapy anymore.
When I was 17 I compromised with my parents and chose my own therapist. I drove myself to every session, it was supposed to be private. My mother found out who I was seeing and convinced them I was a danger to myself. Yet again, everything I said in therapy was communicated to my mom for “safety reasons”. It took less for me to notice this time, but it was still several months of compromised sessions before I realized.
It happened again when I was 19 with a college counselor and at 20 with a psychiatrist. Each time, I made it clear that my mother is insane and that I’m not a danger to myself or others, but she continues to gain access to things that should be totally private.
TLDR: I saw 4 different mental health professionals from ages 14-20. Most I picked myself. Every single one violated confidentiality with my narcissistic and controlling mother, who I am NC with.
It’s been many years now and I need mental health care. I need to get back on my medications and I probably need therapy. But I don’t think I’ll ever trust a medical professional again.
How do I find a therapist I can trust? I don’t think it’s possible but I need help