how do you deal with being cheated on by someone who you thought loved you

backstory we’ve (24 f and 24 m) been together 6 years. he was the first person to treat me like i was a person and the first person that didn’t cheat on and abandon me. i waited on him when he went to boot camp and left it i stayed with him thru jobs and everything. recently in the summer i had my mom pass on me suddenly and that just messed me up a lot, and then my dog i raised from a baby got sick and i couldn’t save him a few months later. i couldn’t continue to live in that state and i used my funds to move us six hours away to a place he said he was gonna move us to for five years but didn’t. we’ve been here for two months with our new puppy things going great. We went out and had a lot of fun other day but that night he got in the shower and left his phone on the bed. i’m not one to go thru his phone so I didn’t really care it was there. it was about 11 pm or so and his phone rang and I.assuming its his mom, tell him someone’s calling and i go to hand him his phone when i see “sexy girl” on the screen calling from instagram. i didn’t say anything i just got confused and sat back down. i tried to think maybe its a spam bot calling but like those don’t call and also a conversation would have to been started for that to be the case. he ended up telling me that he only sent waist pics to some accounts for money and that one just happened to get obsessed. i don’t get it. his mom gives him money, his dad gives him money, i have money that he uses whenever he pleases. what was the reason for that. its almost been a week and i still can’t be around him without having something in my system so i can’t feel anything. i can’t even exist without feeling numb.
My question is, he’s trying to get me to go out to eat or go different places with him but I just don’t want to. I don’t trust his money and i don’t want to go out bc the last time we did, i found out he was cheating.
And to add insult to injury, the night I was willing to go out and possibly talk about, he fell asleep on the sofa until 10 pm. I just wanna get past these feelings and actually be able to eat bc i can’t even eat or drink hardly. He keeps saying sorry and I just don’t feel it’s honest. (this parts a lil NSFW) he uses me while i’m sleep and not awake enough to push him off and thinks that means i’m okay with him now but that just makes me feel more used. How do i get past these feelings with him.

tldr, the only person who claimed they cared and that I stuck with thru a lot cheated for seemingly no reason and expects me to just get over it.