How do you do a pee test without peeing on your hand??

r/

Idk where to post this but everytime I do them it gets all over my hand or dribbles on the side of the cup. How the hell do I not make a mess?? Sorry if this isn’t the right sub I just don’t know if any other AFABs deal w this and if it’s a me issue

Comments

  1. asffje6 Avatar

    I just hover over the toilet seat and pee a lil bit first, then stop and put the cup more or less where I seen the pee come out? And I never missed I don’t know hahahaha

  2. girlrandal Avatar

    I just shove my whole vulva in the cup if it doesn’t have to be a clean catch. Otherwise I just clean up anything that missed.

  3. EXXPat Avatar

    In my experience, the cups are sized for men and are too small in width for women.

  4. Meshugugget Avatar

    I wonder if using a she-wee or similar urination device would work… I mean, it should? I’ve peed into a bottle with one while camping and didn’t make a mess. Those do take some practice but it should be doable.

    Another option… disposable gloves 😂

  5. underboobfunk Avatar

    Make sure that your labia aren’t stuck together.

  6. 8Bells Avatar

    Some labs have disposable cup collars. 
    But I’m second on the train where I pee a bit to start and then line it up after.

  7. clucks86 Avatar

    Pee jug.

    You know the cheap plastic measuring jugs? Buy one just for peeing. It’s handy because it’s wide enough, has a handle and a little pour spout for pouring into sample pots. If you live with people maybe label it so there’s no unfortunate mix ups.

  8. TheSentientSnail Avatar

    Like.. in the specimen cup? Press the whole thing firmly around the upper part of your genital area. The top of the cup should be just above your clitoris, and the bottom should be near your vaginal opening. Move your feet back around the base of the toilet, and tilt your pelvis so so that gravity wants to take the stream towards your clitoris, not back. Control the release of urine as best you can, and hope for the best! We all get a little bit of spillage, it’s somewhat expected with an imprecise urine outlet like afab have. lol.

  9. ThisTooWillEnd Avatar

    Just accept that there will be a mess. Set the cup on a paper towel, wash your hands, wipe off the outside of the cup with another towel. The person handling your sample will be wearing gloves and not expect the outside of the cup to be clean.

  10. Resident_Goat_Crow Avatar

    I start my pee stream before I put the cup into it. It still gets the sides but I just use a paper towel before putting it in the cupboard for the nurse.

  11. galacticprincess Avatar

    Some people can’t. Just close the cup and rinse the outside along with your hands.

  12. faeriechyld Avatar

    Start pee. Stop steam, position cup. Start pee again.

    Usually still get some peepee splash somewhere anyway, wash hands.

  13. buttmunch3 Avatar

    that’s the thing. you don’t

  14. ultraviolette__ Avatar

    I just…let it happen 😭 I have a phat one so pressing it against the cup can at times make more of a mess. I just try my best to aim and then wash my hands after lol

  15. punkpizza666 Avatar

    I start peeing and then I put the cup wherever the stream is. Easy pee-zy

  16. wadnil56 Avatar

    When I have to give a urine sample at the lab I ask for a “hat”. It is a device that sits between the toilet seat and rim of the bowl that collects the urine. It can be tricky to do the sequence: clean area with provided wipe, pee into the bowl just a bit, get up and put the hat in place (while holding your urine stream in), empty bladder.

    It is the most foolproof way I have found not to contaminate the urine in any way.

    I don’t think you can re-use the hat for subsequent clean catches but you might be able to re-use it for other purposes.

  17. ShortSweetFluffy Avatar

    Having a potty hat/urine hat changed the game for me, some labs might not have them but it’s worth asking!

  18. scientits69 Avatar

    I either do what others say (whole vulva gets contact with the cup if not clean catch) or just start peeing and dip the cup in and then out like getting a glass of water from the sink..? This has me thinking I pee real strong or something 😂😭

  19. aderaptor Avatar

    Pee a little while watching, legs spread and bent over a bit helps things open up as well usually resulting in a nice stream. Stop peeing and position cup, then go again. STOP peeing once the cup has enough in it, then finish your pee freely without cup in place.

    It’s the beginning of the end that gets tricky, so just don’t involve the cup in those two phases. I never pee on my hands!

    Then just wash up good when you’re done 👍

  20. scouter Avatar

    The med lab should have a “hat”, a funnel-like device that rests on the toilet seat to catch the flow and channel it into the collection cup. I am not aware of the details of operation as I am male but I see the nurses handing the “hats” to female patients.

  21. pale_on_pale Avatar

    The whole urine sample process was clearly designed by a man.

    I pee into a larger vessel that I float on the toilet water and then transfer the pee.

  22. RuefulCat Avatar

    Edge of the cup under the urethra 👍🏻

  23. raksha25 Avatar

    Do the wipes, spread with my non cup holding hand, pee just a bit so ive got the angle, then position the cup and go. It works 90% of the time. But honestly, just ask for an extra wipe and have it open and draped over your leg to wipe up your hands after closing the lid. Even if I didn’t get myself, I still have it prepped and use it.

  24. Sebastian_dudette Avatar

    At a lab / doctor’s office, ask for a “hat.” ( Looks a bit like a hat if you turn it upside down. )

    Place the hat between the bowl and the toilet seat. Pee in to hat, pour pee into cup, dump rest in toilet, and throw away the hat.

  25. AvaS23 Avatar

    Ask them if they can provide a “hat” to set in the toilet then you can pee into it and dump in the cup. Or ask them for disposable gloves. I always get it on outside of cup then wipe off with toilet paper then hold it with clean toilet paper for handoff or putting in cabinet.

  26. lady-luthien Avatar

    Honestly, my strategy is not so much to pee in the cup as it is to catch some pee in the cup while peeing. Think like when you have to get two cups of water from a water dispenser, you can kind of just swap them without stopping the water? I do that, then stop peeing immediately because those cups are too damn small. There may be a drop or two on the side, but so it goes.

  27. QueenVell Avatar

    Ask for the pee “hat”. Those specimen cups are too small and too awkward to use.

  28. DagorGurth Avatar

    There are disposable handles made to hold the cup for AFAB patients. My lab had them for a whole week. They exist but the medical field is so completely man centric they never get used.

  29. HayleyMcIntyre Avatar

    I’m in the uk and here they’ve always given me a little disposable metal bowl. You pee in that and then transfer it to the sample bottle and close the lid. Ask if they have anything like that there for you.

  30. flyingscrotus Avatar

    I have an innie so I just spread da lips with 2 fingers and it’s a straight shot.

  31. Krzykat350 Avatar

    Did see on uk amazon you can get a tray like thing with a handle and spout.

  32. TryingKindness Avatar

    I don’t. I try, but it’s never 100%.

  33. talinseven Avatar

    You pee on your hand

  34. narnababy Avatar

    Had to do loads of pee tests when I was pregnant; my main tip is start peeing then look and put it in the stream. You can mostly avoid getting it on your hands then! Then seal the cup, dump it in the sink, wash the cup and hands, then dry them.

  35. cgjeep Avatar

    Does your testing facility provide the wide cups for women or just the bottle?

  36. 2ez2b4ortun8 Avatar

    My doc offers a urine catcher (like an ipside down hat)and a glove for the less agile.

  37. goatofglee Avatar

    I was telling my wife that the pee cups should come with something like a disposable she were the other day

  38. Beautiful_Rhubarb Avatar

    ask for a ‘hat’ it’s an insert that goes in the toilet.. it’s easy to pour it into the cup , throw it out wash hands be on your way.

  39. danathepaina Avatar

    I ask for a latex glove. Because no matter what I do, I get pee on my hand.

  40. Slim-Shadys-Fat-Tits Avatar

    Honestly I just accepted my fate of pissy hands, wipe up as good as I can and then go wash my paws thoroughly 🫣

  41. danceoftheplants Avatar

    You press the cup firmly against yourself so it is over your clit and over the vag hole and then you pee while leaning forward a bit. You listen as it is filling up and stop peeing before it overflows. Then gently pull the cup down and screw the lid on and then finish your pee.

    I’ve never peed on myself since doing this

  42. No-Fishing5325 Avatar

    You ask for a plastic hat. And pee in it and then pour it in the cup. They have the plastic disposable hats. That is what they are called. Hats. They look like an inside out hat. It fits on the toilet.

  43. MareV51 Avatar

    Why can’t labs use a cone/funnel for providing urine samples?

  44. Wonderful_Gap1374 Avatar

    Plop your leg up against the wall above the urinal and hold the stick out. When your stream is nice and still, cut the stream with the stick.

  45. rundownv2 Avatar

    I’m a post op trans woman and the first time I had to pee in a cup I had absolutely no idea how to do it. I’ve only had to do it like…twice since, and it’s still messy ;_;

  46. Leasshunte Avatar

    Having done drug tests for work for 24 years, and observed many more, in my experience, pee a bit, then move your cup to where the stream was. It helps if you are able to look down and watch.

    I always laid out paper towels in the bathroom to lay everything out on. If you pee on your hand, use the paper towel to touch everything else until you can wash your hands.

  47. Schmidaho Avatar

    I just accept that I’ll probably get pee on my hand. Hands wash!

  48. UnrepentantLush Avatar

    There’s usually some form of nitrile glove in the bathroom when you’re doing it. I grab one of those or try to grab one on my way into the bathroom and cover my hand that’s holding the cup. Then just remove turning inside out. If there’s no glove, I’ll just wash with soap after and try to wipe the initial off with toilet paper.
    But you are not alone. When I was in my teens I took accutane and you have to have a pregnancy test every time month. I opted for a blood test every time over peeing into the cup because I hated it.

  49. freshlyintellectual Avatar

    i start peeing a bit then bring the cup under the stream- you don’t need a lot of it

  50. Mercurial_Morals Avatar

    Ask the doctor / pathology collector for A larger disposable plastic or paper cup, then pour into the specimen jar.

  51. zuklei Avatar

    Idk I have 16 years experience trying to conceive (done now thank goddess) and using ovulation strips sometimes twice a day and pregnancy tests daily at the end of my cycle and still fucking pee on myself whether I have a cup or not. I’m even very well acquainted with how my anatomy looks. I just lack any sense of where my fucking hand is.

    Good luck.

  52. wrenaissance44 Avatar

    First drug test I ever took for my first job, the tech slopped some of the pee onto the CARPETED floor. Like WHYYYYY
    I also stressed about peeing in a cup. I just try and start slow.

  53. Rachelattack Avatar

    There’s presumably a sink right there? Can’t cook an omelette w/o breaking a few eggs

  54. sysaphiswaits Avatar

    Never have. Just wash up after.