I feel like the biggest jerk ever for even asking this.
It didn’t start out a huge giant mess. But now the few things have grown exponentially, despite myany attempts to say don’t bring anymore sh*t here.
I don’t even have a space for my own tools anymore. All attempts to organize have not failed, but have taken many months to complete.
It’s just a giant mess. But his path and space is clear. Lol not mine.
He started using drugs while he was here on top of it
Not a ton I don’t think, just enough to keep him awake all night and still be able to speak properly and have conversations.
There are other things that have happened. He isn’t a danger to anyone, though. Just himself.
But the mess is hurting my own abilities and my stuff gets so lost in the mix of it all.
I asked him to find a spot to put it. I’ve tried to help him get his ID…..several times.
I take him to trade in batteries and copper he finds. Prior, I helped him get a storage, but he got kicked out for peeing by the dumpster. Lol
Where are homeless people supposed to go to the bathroom?
But still, I get it….
I’ve asked soany times now. Nothing ever gets done and I just cannot take it anymore.
How the heck do I do this in a respectful manner?
When I do bring it up he avoids me and that drives me nuts.
I’m stuck looking at it day in and day out.
I can’t organize certain parts of my home anymore. I can’t use part ofy yard anymore. He has a hoarding problem.
Comments
You don’t have to set yourself on fire to keep someone else warm. You did a very sweet thing by giving him a space, but he took more than was agreed upon. You’re finding out how addiction and mental illness leads to homelessness.
Honestly in your situation I would ask him to leave. He is putting you at risk for eviction! And he has definitely harmed you already by his actions. But you sound like someone who has trouble saying ‘no’, and much more trouble saying ‘go’. My advice then would be to sit down with him. Explain that he is no longer allowed to store anything at your place. A toothbrush. Some clothes. That’s it. He is not to use, or have, any illegal drugs in your place. Be very clear that overstepping one of these boundaries will mean you will no longer allow him to stay.
But honestly I urge you to tell him he has to pack up his stuff and leave. For you own safety. For your own sanity.
It’s time for some boundaries to be set here. Give a deadline, put it in writing if you have to, and follow through. This isn’t about being mean—it’s about protecting your home, your sanity, and your stuff.
He’s got struggles, yeah, but that doesn’t mean your life gets to be collateral damage. You’ve already done more than enough for him, nothing else to do at this point. He’s taking your kindness for weakness.