I’m more vocal with “I love you” s and ” you’re so handsome” ” you’re MY baby” etc.
When my partner finishes I let him stay for a few seconds and I put my hand around the back of his neck and gently rub the back of his head down to his neck . I’ve been told this was very comforting and helped ease any immediate performance issues anxiety.
It starts with communication. Have you established a good foundation of trust with the person you are going to be intimate with? Have you clearly defined any and all boundaries that make you feel comfortable before you have sex? Doing this will help you feel more ease and peace while being intimate. This way your mind isn’t racing wondering what they want or “ah should I have told them I’m not okay with XYZ thing? What if they want to do that while we are having sex??”
You and the other person will already know what the other is okay with and will know the boundaries laid out on both sides.
With this you can relax your mind and focus on the feelings of your body. Additionally to stay present during you can ask your partner questions or you can declare things of yourself and how you feel. For example “that feels really good that you’re doing that” or you can ask the other person “would you like me to do this to you now?” “Tell me how this feels for you when I do this”
The vulnerability is a part of trust and boundaries shared through good communication with the person you’re going to be intimate with. Being present comes from being mindful of your own body and thinking about the pleasure you feel, and what pleasure you can create for the other person and asking them how they feel too.
My approach? … masturbate more. Become very, very familiar with your own pleasure. Figure out how to get yourself off consistently. Once you are very comfortable on your own and you know you’re gunna have an orgasm / feel great no matter what, it gets a lot easier to be present. Focus on your own pleasure in the moment – and that’s a whole lot easier when you know how to feel pleasure on your own.
Other tips I’ve heard are to walk around the house naked as much as possible, lol, so that being naked in front of another person doesn’t feel like you are totally exposed.
i think it has a lot to do with the partner imo. personally when the other person makes me feel really desired and seems turned on by not only me but what’s happening between us – it’s easy and not something i really dwell on vs having a partner who doesn’t communicate and isn’t as comfortable with themselves or attentive to my needs, it’s not as enjoyable and i’m in my head a lot/less present.
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Initiate (really wanting it), be passionate/enthusiastic, and be in the moment.
A lot of conversation outside of the setting of sex. The most important sex organ is the brain.
I’m more vocal with “I love you” s and ” you’re so handsome” ” you’re MY baby” etc.
When my partner finishes I let him stay for a few seconds and I put my hand around the back of his neck and gently rub the back of his head down to his neck . I’ve been told this was very comforting and helped ease any immediate performance issues anxiety.
It starts with communication. Have you established a good foundation of trust with the person you are going to be intimate with? Have you clearly defined any and all boundaries that make you feel comfortable before you have sex? Doing this will help you feel more ease and peace while being intimate. This way your mind isn’t racing wondering what they want or “ah should I have told them I’m not okay with XYZ thing? What if they want to do that while we are having sex??”
You and the other person will already know what the other is okay with and will know the boundaries laid out on both sides.
With this you can relax your mind and focus on the feelings of your body. Additionally to stay present during you can ask your partner questions or you can declare things of yourself and how you feel. For example “that feels really good that you’re doing that” or you can ask the other person “would you like me to do this to you now?” “Tell me how this feels for you when I do this”
The vulnerability is a part of trust and boundaries shared through good communication with the person you’re going to be intimate with. Being present comes from being mindful of your own body and thinking about the pleasure you feel, and what pleasure you can create for the other person and asking them how they feel too.
My approach? … masturbate more. Become very, very familiar with your own pleasure. Figure out how to get yourself off consistently. Once you are very comfortable on your own and you know you’re gunna have an orgasm / feel great no matter what, it gets a lot easier to be present. Focus on your own pleasure in the moment – and that’s a whole lot easier when you know how to feel pleasure on your own.
Other tips I’ve heard are to walk around the house naked as much as possible, lol, so that being naked in front of another person doesn’t feel like you are totally exposed.
Music does it for me. Playlists
I try to maintain more eye contact with my partner. The eyes chico, they never lie.
i think it has a lot to do with the partner imo. personally when the other person makes me feel really desired and seems turned on by not only me but what’s happening between us – it’s easy and not something i really dwell on vs having a partner who doesn’t communicate and isn’t as comfortable with themselves or attentive to my needs, it’s not as enjoyable and i’m in my head a lot/less present.