Late Bloomer Here (26)
This is a Q for those who never had a mutual romantic bond until later.
How did it feel when someone finally saw/chose you?
How does it feel to be genuinely seen and wanted after never really being chosen?
r/AskWomen
Late Bloomer Here (26)
This is a Q for those who never had a mutual romantic bond until later.
How did it feel when someone finally saw/chose you?
Comments
Really really wonderful, but also really confusing, triggering, destabilizing, etc. in that it can bring up a lot of feelings of “I don’t deserve this” or “There’s gotta be a catch” or “Somehow this is all gonna fall apart,” etc.
26 is not a late bloomer lol
It feels like coming home to a place you didn’t know you were missing. Confusing at first but peaceful. Like maybe you’re not too hard to love after all.
Not “late” really, but because of circumstances I didn’t believe myself dateworthy until I was 23 and almost done with grad school. When I finally landed a legitimate partner I still had to overcome all the imposter syndrome before I could accept his love was legitimate.
And it took a huge gesture on his part! The dude secretly learned sign language for the first six months we were dating, just so he could talk to my deaf sister directly the first time he met her in person. That came after our experience being raised in a foster family who refused to learn sign and relied on me to interpret.
That was the moment I knew for a fact that I would marry him!
It felt like finally being able to breathe. Like, all the years of feeling invisible suddenly made sense because now I knew what it should feel like. I didn’t have to chase, he just chose me…. and that was everything.
that feeling is so worth it, trust me
Both a blessing and a curse tbh. On one hand, you feel happy about it and it feels like home, and on the other hand, you just can’t believe that someone ACTUALLY likes you??
Like I wouldn’t date me if I was someone else LMAOO
I’m basically the skeptical snake meme that says, “when life throws someone who gets along with you way too good, and you’re waiting for the catch”
I wasn’t really chosen by anyone until I was in my 40s, then all of a sudden it was dozens of them. So for context I am also a late bloomer, and still trying to figure a lot of this out and recognize what is normal.
I would say there is a HUGE difference between someone wanting you sexually and someone being in love with you.
I have a current casual partner who is very sexually attracted to me but not in love with me (and vice versa.) He treats me well and we like each other a lot, it’s just not the whole in-love thing. The sexual attraction is empowering and exhilarating, but at times almost scary. I enjoy it for sure and it’s such a great self-esteem boost. I have a whole new relationship with my body because of it. Super fun and exciting feeling!
A while ago a friend and I fell hard in love for each other, but it didn’t work out. Still… All this time later I think about the way he looked at me, like sunshine pouring out of his face, like joy, like everything I ever wanted. The feeling is like crack. You feel high. I did some weird things while under the influence of that love, because I wanted more of it so badly I was happy to burn my whole life down. I still dream about the way he turned his heart toward me, and I wake up crying and longing to have that again, and fuck, at this point I might never get over it and maybe this is just how the rest of my life will go. It’s intense and soul shattering. We never even really got into a relationship, never even kissed, just felt it, and the way he loved me changed my entire life. That shit is powerful and intense, maybe more than any other experience in life.
Of course you hope to have a partner who shows you both, but if I had to pick, I’d take love every time.