How has going out changed for you over 30?

r/

Disclaimer: I am probably overthinking this.

I avoid going otu to clubs/lounges I went to in my early twenties cause they just feel like places I should have grown out of but that kinda leaves me in the limbo of where do people my age go now? A lot of my friend group is kinda struggling with working that out. COVID also closed a few places I did feel were like cool for people in their thirties.

I also realized that I was more tapped in because my friends were promoters or dating promoters and those folk now have kids and go out less too.

Do y’all still go to the same places as you did when you were younger?

Do you feel like you had places to kinda age up into?

Comments

  1. StrainHappy7896 Avatar

    I still go out just to different places – higher end cocktail bars or wine bars, breweries, or wineries. Sometimes lounges but they can end up too clubby. I find local dive-ish bars tend to be more of a 30s+ crowd, but they’re not really my preference for going out.

  2. Rosemarysage5 Avatar

    I don’t do clubs/lounges often because I can’t stay up that late regularly and I don’t drink much anymore. Where I go is mostly dependent on which friends I’m hanging with.

    However I really do miss going out dancing. I hate that most middle aged activities are centered around eating and drinking and not moving. My husband and I do active things together, but it’s a rarity with friends

  3. somuchsong Avatar

    Not much at all.

    I’ve been a bit of a grandma since my 20s, so I never went to clubs or spent a lot of time in bars. If I go out at night, I’m probably going out to dinner or to see a movie.

  4. OkFriend1573 Avatar

    I go out: on a limb, of my mind with stress, of fucks to give, of printer ink before I really need to print something, of patience….. this is how going out has changed for me in my thirties 🥲

  5. confused_grenadille Avatar

    I’m in my 30s and I go out dancing few times a month. Perhaps 2-3 weekends a month depending on various factors. I also went out often in my 20s. I favor dance clubs over bars/cocktail bars/lounges because dancing is kind of a necessity for me and I can do it solo if I like. I don’t think clubbing should be a 20-something thing and that you retire in your 30s. I live in NYC it’s not unusual to see 50 year olds in the club here.

    I totally get not opting to go to places you went to when you were younger. It’s the same for me – it’s a younger crowd with less etiquette typically. Your options depend on your city’s nightlife offerings. I’d suggest looking and asking around about curated parties – the type that host parties in different venues and rotate the same type of DJs – these typically bring a curated more 30-something crowd and a good vibe.

  6. TheVirtualAttorney Avatar

    I’ve found I prefer a good lounge or brewery over a club, but lately my ideal night out would be dinner and a movie with friends before the former places I mentioned.

  7. __looking_for_things Avatar

    I’m home by midnight. Lol.

    I’m less concerned with the establishment and more concerned with who is also in the establishment. I live in a college city so too many folks under 25 makes me want to leave. And then there’s the music. I must be old because I’d be perfectly happy with late 90s/early 2000s music.

    My midsize city doesn’t have clubs. So that’s not a concern. I would love to have at least a lounge or a bar that has room for people to dance.

  8. rovingred Avatar

    I don’t go out to the bars or clubs where the younger 20 somethings frequent downtown and in the trendy neighborhoods anymore. I tried with my friends a few weeks ago, we went dancing at one of the massive bars that get packed around 11 and yeah…I just wanted to be home the whole time haha. For me going out is a nice dinner and cocktails and then maybe playing a game or two of pool at the hall across from our house, then back in my 10:30/11 at the latest. If the bars start getting rowdy and I’m still out I pack it in 😂

    That being said 5 years ago I was a party animal and jumped at any chance to go out – bar/club/house party and would be out until the wee hours of the morning

  9. whatasmallbird Avatar

    Depends on events. If there’s a cool event like a Latin dance night or goth night, I’m down. But otherwise I’d rather be at a chill bar like a brewery. I’ll sometimes go to the dive bar because I enjoy playing pool

  10. LadyBosie Avatar

    I don’t go to clubs anymore, but for me that’s great since I always hated them, lol. But my husband and I go out all the time to cocktail bars and live music venues. Some of those overlap a lot with people in their twenties as well but not in a way that makes us feel out of place (we’re in a college town). The problem is also friends, we like going out with them but so many have kids or are just not that interested in nightlife anymore.

  11. Capital_Hedgehog0506 Avatar

    I was never a going out type of person, but my closest friends were so that’s after I often found myself doing (most of my closest friends were social butterflies)

    Now that I’m 35, I’ve accepted it’s not my thing and that’s ok! I like spaces that are quieter

  12. Glad_Astronomer_9692 Avatar

    I dont go out like that and haven’t really since I was 26. Going out is like getting dinner somewhere or joining a club or local civic event. I go to my library, local protests, political group meetings, eat out with my friends, take my kid to a city organized class, Im meeting plenty of people this way and they are all interesting. I have a social life it’s just taking place in different places and I honestly prefer it to what I did in my early 20s.

  13. miss_rabbit143 Avatar

    I don’t do clubs and bars, certainly because of the changes to my spirituality as I grew older. I’m now more of a homebody, or take myself out for long drives when I’m bored in weekends.

  14. FinalBlackberry Avatar

    I haven’t been to a club since my mid 20’s. We like wineries, brunches, dinners and work events such as award dinners and the likes.

  15. DifficultPop858 Avatar

    I love a weekly dinner with friends, or a monthly craft night!

  16. Infinite-Gap-9903 Avatar

    Restaurants , bars . Most people in their 30s have settled down and started families and their priorities are with the kids

  17. trickyhunter21 Avatar

    I’ve started clubbing with my friends once a month recently. The trick for us is to take a long nap during the day, meet up half past midnight, and then dance until 5am. This cuts down on the length of partying, while going out at the optimal time.

    Gone are the days when I can start partying at 8pm and go on until the early morning, so this strategy has worked wonders for us so far. We even did a “test run” of partying from 9-11:30 pm to make sure we would be ready for it.

    I should also note that I grew up with a father who does live singing at restaurants and lounges, and his main audience is 40+ who are on their feet for most of the night. So I never had the expectation that once I’m older I should stop going out.