When you’re about to head to bed with a new partner, how much do the little things matter? Leg stubble, zits, and for older folks grey hairs, wrinkles, varicose veins or (sorry) haemorrhoids…?
Edited to add: this presumes that hygiene, hair, make up, nice underwear etc are all present and accounted for. And the stubble is ‘I’ve just shaved’ stubble, not ‘am overdue for a wax’ stubble!
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Since you shitlords like to delete your posts, here’s an original copy of /u/Even-Green4166’s post (if available):
When you’re about to head to bed with a new partner, how much do the little things matter? Leg stubble, zits, and for older folks grey hairs, wrinkles, varicose veins or (sorry) haemorrhoids…?
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Not much at all.
Probably they would matter long before we get to bed, chances are with enough alcohol everything stops mattering.
I’m too busy thinking of my own performance. If I’m sleeping with her, I’ve make my choice. I’m not thinking of little details/flaws.
That vagina better be right. That’s all I am going to say.
All of them matter a little.
When there a lot of those, than it can matter a lot
You’re already horned up and it would take a lot to derail the mood. Ever hear of Louis CKs bit of men having sex with a woman who says “I beheaded your mother” and the man will likely say “okay we’re going to finish this up (the sex) but afterwords we’re going to have a serious conversation of what you did to my mother!”.
Are you planning on picking up in a seniors home? Jesus…
Grey hair? Bro people get greys in their teens and 20’s
Details matter in ANY investigation.
Not much, something would have to be seriously wrong to make a dent.
To me? Not at all. My girl has sensative skin, and I usually like to help her pop any acne she has. She’s comfortable around me, she farts and I freaking love it! I love how comfortable she is getting around me. She needs to know that i can never find her gross.
I mean. First couple times? Yeah I’m probably going to care if your legs are hairy and you have a big old haemorrhoid.
Not that I care that much about my girlfriend being smooth all the time, I actually don’t care all that much. I’ve lived with Women. But if you’re half assing it your first time out it says a lot about the person.
Everyone has some fluffy bits, everyone has a bit of cellulite, everyone has stretch marks. Im 38 and rarely date women under 30. I get people age and the rare person defies that reality.
But still, first few times you should probably be putting in the slightest bit of effort.
When the chemistry’s there stuff like stubble or zits barely matters. It’s the connection that counts.
All cats are grey in the dark
Not much. The only thing that can throw me off is attitude or smells. If you just want to lay there and aren’t into like I am, I’m out. If you smell bad because of poor hygiene, I’m out.
You. I dont think you care that much at that point.
Enter alcohol🙃🙃
seriously though, haemorrhoids? that’s a SUPER thorough pre-bedroom check over you have done on the partner!
Grey hair ain’t been an issue, wrinkles are wrinkles we all have them, stubble is fine but heavy zits can be unsightly. Anything that’s separate from like regular hygiene e.g. varicose veins isn’t too much of an issue, it’s the not body trimming or excessive pubic hair that can be more of an issue. Keep it tidy and clean and generally you’re good, because a good personality does a lot of lifting for appearances too.
If her issues are on par with my issues, then we are equal. I’ll happily fuck her brains out.
Details?
I mean, if they’re more than 100 pounds overweight we may have to alter our position–but… details? Jesus, someone is actualy willing to have sex with me; I consider that enough of a win that I’m not worrying about gray hair or crows feet.
doesn’t matter…had sex.
I tend to just be happy I’ve been invited. It’s a poor guest who accepts an invitation and yet complains about his hosts drapes or the carpet… err… so to speak.
Virtually not at all. Especially with an actual significant other versus a casual hookup. We are human with bodies and bodies are weird, im not going to stress about it. Yes you need general attraction but the details rarely come into that.
They matter a lot, but probably not in the way you think. If he’s really in the moment, those “imperfections” are likely to feel endearing, not distracting. These little details can actually deepen the connection, forming a stronger appreciation for you as a whole person. Nobody is perfect. We all have bodies. If you’re with someone who truly cares about you, those things won’t push them away. They’ll bring them closer.
For men what matters is they found someone who wants to be in bed with them and have sex. Now if your body if a problem for you then that could lead to a bad experience. Ive had some women say “dont touch my belly, im ashamed of it” and that just takes your problem and making me have to deal with it. when the solution is to see someone who LOVES your belly and wants to touch it and learn to enjoy that and yourself.
At that point I’m super busy worrying about my own imperfections so not really.
Physical appearance is extremely important to me. Just being honest. The show aint gonna stop over a few zits or leg stubble. But depending on the specific issues I may be dissuaded from future encounters.
If I’m at the point I’m taking a woman to bed unless their is something majorly unclean like it’s clear she doesn’t bathe and wash herself then hair and natural aging doesn’t matter to me.
As humans we can only control a certain amount of factors when it comes to our body and if we stay hung up on so many of them we are bound to be disappointed by what we see. There are things I am physically attracted to, but off the start I want to be emotionally and mentally attracted to you.
If i’m at the point that im interested in going to bed with you then none of that matters. At least to me.
I’m just a guy. You’re just a girl.
I’m just happy to be there.
Don’t care. I’m a hairy dude, a little on the chunky side, and I’m closing in on 40. I tell my girlfriend all the time that she only has to shave her legs and stuff in she really wants to. She’s a redhead so it’s light anyways, but if I’m not going to hold her to standards that I myself won’t
It doesn’t.
Nothing at all, I’d even say they matter but in a positive way. Trust me when I say that ‘imperfect’ women turn me on even more than a goddess and my taste on women couldn’t be any more diverse.
Of course, as with everyone there’s speciffic things I don’t like but those are more related with hygiene than anything
I’m just happy to be there
How big is this zit? And where is it?
If you’re at the point of having sex, nothing that didn’t matter up to then will matter.
I’m sorry if I’m getting naked I’ve already gone beyond the details so unless it’s something completely unexpected and out there (like whipping out meat bigger than mine) the details become rather academic
Honestly, the most important detail here is Hygiene. Everything else doesn’t really matter.
It doesnt matter.We are not machines. I remember it was said somewere in a show i watched when i was younger(RWBY):Scathing eyes ask that we be symmetrical, one sided and easily processed. Yet every misshapen spark’s unseen beauty is greater than its would be judgement.
If I’m still thinking then the sex is not good enough.
Beyond the basic hygiene, Sexy is in the mind and the body follows. If we wait on physical perfection there are going to be a hell of a lot of men not having sex at all. To be fair, Men do NOT have a corner on the market in terms of physical perfection so we don’t have much room to insist on anything different in our partners.
“Give me those stretch marks baby, I think they’re sexy just like you!”
Let he/she who has never gotten razor burn cast the first stone.
I’m looking at the good, not the bad.
I think once you get varicose veins, then your eyesight isn’t good enough to notice them and if you’re paying attention to that you’re probably doing it wrong anyway. Pay attention to your partner.
It always matters more to her than it does to me.
Honestly the only detail that would be a deal breaker for me is bad odor, either bad breath, BO, or a stinky snatch.
Lol whaaaat. I haven’t removed hair in 5 years or worn make up in a decade and have no problems.
None
None of it matters, the lights are off anyway
Loving these answers, but would they still apply if you’re 20 years older than your man? Cause the insecurities are real. Knowing he went from 20 yr olds to a 40 yr old woman is a source of anxiety for me, although I try hard not to show it.
I love popping ladies zits!
All of the details matter because you don’t want that person to do something that you’re not interested in but most people have communication problems so 🤷🏻♂️
Leg stubble is actively uncomfortable to touch, so I’m definitely going to notice that, especially if it’s like sandpaper.
Not going to overthink it.. we’ll probably laugh over the little things afterwards. Enjoy the moment .