How much effort in the relationship is too much effort?

r/

In a relationship, or the beginning thereof… when do you consider a partner’s effort good effort and when do you consider that way too much? (Example: reflecting on the relationship, not just calling, etc.)

Comments

  1. Far-Alternative7258 Avatar

    In the very beginning, imo texting/calling/facetiming everyday is overkill and annoying. I prefer to get to know someone in person so I prefer to just text/call to make plans & maybe chat here and there. Any “I love you” -like sayings are way too much. Expecting sex- too much. Flowers are great, maybe a small gift. Anything beyond that feels like it comes with expectations.

  2. Melodic-Mycologist34 Avatar

    Anything that is not reciprocated with the same enthusiasm one way or the other.

  3. DimmyMoore70 Avatar

    I don’t think there anything as too much effort in a LTR as long as efforts are reciprocal and appreciated.

    But in NEW relationships I would say that too much means they’re moving too fast and are not matching my energy. (Ex.They’re calling too much or doing too much) Or if I’m doing too much I will feel drained and like I’m chasing. Never good.

    I thinking mirroring/matching effort for at least the first six months is the way to go.

  4. andson-r Avatar

    My last potential girlfriend ditched me because I asked her too many questions. Apparantly, I’m supposed to ignore and respond slowly and keep everything mysterious