Alright, so I, 48M, have always been challenged in the ass department. We’re talking people wish the had abs as flat as my ass. I joke with my friends and family that I have a ‘Gluteus Minimus’ instead of Maximus, or that I have ‘anti-ass’ where, much like anti-matter, if it were to come into contact with an ass, it could rip a hole 8n the space time continuum!
While I’ve never been obese, I have lost about 30-40 pounds over the last year, and I pretty much can’t sit anywhere for any extended amount of time. This came to mind today while I was waiting at my son’s orthodontist appointment. The seats they have for parents are literally wooden stools, and this appointment was longer than usual. Within 10 minutes, my tailbone was killing me, so I tried leaning forward some, which just put pressure on my hips/leg bones, but wasa little better, but after a half hour, my lower back and legs were wrecked, lol.
Long drives are hell, movies are pretty much out. I can’t even sit on a couch for an extended period of time! The only seat that’s comfy is the driver’s seat of the bus i just bought, i drove that bitch 8 hours straight with minimal discomfort! So, if you don’t have an ass, like me, what the hell is your solution to this problem?
I can’t believe I have to ask this question! ROFL
Comments
I think its time for some squats to turn that gluteus minimus into a gluteus midimus
Hank Hill?
Let me know if you figure something out.
The worst is one of my favorite music venues in Nashville, the Ryman. They have wooden church pews that are not made for the bony-assed.
I too was born without an ass, however I haven’t had any particular problem sitting on my non-ass. I guess you need a dedicated cushion for uncomfortable seats. A prosthetic ass, if you will.
I also recommend squats.
Get a gym membership and start doing booty exercises like hips thrusts, squats, cable kickbacks, etc. Look up Brett Contreras, he claims to be the person who “invented” the hip thrust, which is one of the best exercises for growing your glutes. He caters more to women, but it doesn’t matter. He has a couple of books with really good workouts (again, aimed at women if you can be man enough to look past that). He has legitimately studied the science behind growing a booty lol. Get them gains, bruh!